


Last Remains

by StrikingLightning



Series: Ash and Water [1]
Category: FTL: Faster Than Light (Video Game), Original Work
Genre: Banter, Brother-Brother Relationship, Consensual Sex, Constant Power Dynamics Reversal, D/s undertones, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fandom Blind, Fucked with each other before fucking each other, Kept allies close and enemies a little TOO close, Kidnapping, Loss of Virginity, Neck Kissing, Oral Sex, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Prisoner of War, Romance, Science Fiction, Sensuality, Slow Build, Space War, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, it was supposed to be a oneshot, star-crossed lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:20:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 31,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27796054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StrikingLightning/pseuds/StrikingLightning
Summary: [Explicit chapters marked with *][Story is completed and will be updated weekly on Monday at 2pm CST][The story will resume a regular posting schedule after major edits for the final chapters]Rebels begin their final push into the crumbling Federation’s capital sector. Newly-promoted Captain Weir manages to steal vital Federation data in the form of DNA carried by his long-time opponent. But attraction has long since been brewing between them, and tensions are running high…It's a tale of a cat and mouse game gone awry.“The thrill was in the chase, after all. But the capture could be satisfying too, as she recalled his sadistic grin as he once pinned her to the wall with his gun on her heart, demanding she hand over the data or else.But there was no need for him to pretend any longer, now that she was his prisoner, stuck on his ship, wrapped in his arms. So why did it seem like this was the most enjoyment he had had yet?”
Relationships: Pell Abernathy/Seinen Weir, Seinen Weir & Elliot Weir
Series: Ash and Water [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2033602
Comments: 106
Kudos: 34
Collections: Discord Community Archive





	1. This Little War-Game We Play

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Federation soldier gets caught with the data and makes it everyone else's problem. And thus, another game kicks off between Rebel and Federation. This time, however, there may not be a victor in the end...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! It's me and I'm back with another FTL story! This story is set in a different universe than the oneshot. 
> 
> This time the premise is a lot more...unique...than usual. But I'm excited! It's been several years since I wrote/published a multichap. I had a lot of fun learning from this project and the many challenges it put me through, and I hope you enjoy the read!
> 
> I know, for the FTL fans out there, the premise might seem a bit bizarre, but I spent months prewriting and polishing this story before it came out. I tagged the story to the best of my ability and, while the story does not have many warnings, I will include the couple I do have when applicable in their respective end notes.
> 
> My betas were instrumental in making sure the writing of this story was superb. Cannot thank them enough. I can guarantee if you have an issue with the story, it'll be a matter of taste and not on the writing quality.
> 
> I had several betas for this chapter. Special thanks to Ghosteh, Karios, Space Aqueerius, Urisarung, Rain, Charlye, AzonicFantasist, and RillaOfIngleside
> 
> On that note, let's go!

“Any moment now, Engineer,” the captain announced to his prisoner.

He turned around, the coattails of his black Rebel uniform swishing. The light from the portview shone on the electric-blue hawk emblem above his heart. “We are going to be in Federation capital starspace.”

His pale, solemn face cracked a wry smile. “Isn’t it funny? The Federation is about to lose the war despite the data being within their very own capital.”

The captive frowned. She was crouched by the door on the opposite side of the room. A passing satellite poured light upon her black hair woven into a bun and brown skin before illuminating him and his black, chin-length wavy hair.

She gritted her teeth at him and how his words twisted her like the electronic handcuffs twisting her hands behind her back. There wasn’t much good humor behind it, but she was wary of how his smile disarmed her, even if only by a little.

He continued, tone mocking, the same smile still plastered across his face. “Your crew has no time to deliver the data. After all, how could they? Little Miss Data is with _me_ right now.”

“Don’t call me that,” she snapped. “I’ve only heard that bullshit name from your degenerate brother. Didn’t realize you’d decided to use it, too.”

His face fell, but he refused to take the bait. The inflammatory remark couldn’t erase the sense of satisfaction he finally felt.

He had done it.

After all this time, he, Captain Seinen Weir, had retrieved the data.

It had been over a year of him and his crew chasing after a lone Kestrel ship, scouting multiple beacons for their trace. It had been a game of cat and mouse as he and his men tried to ensnare the enemy ship and obtain the vital data the ship had stored away, or at the very least, prevent them from delivering it.

The enemy crew members also carried it on microchips for several months before it got encoded straight into their engineer’s DNA. A clever move, he admitted, that had resulted in a tougher pursuit.

Yes, it was not so easy to admit, as a once humble Rebel lieutenant, now elevated to captain, that he had considered this unsuspecting Federation crew a minimal threat. And yet, they had turned out to be quite the handful for him, managing to outmaneuver him on multiple occasions.

How infuriating. His foes weren’t even officially ensigns, the lowest rung of the ladder. He and his brother, bested by a trio of honorary ensigns? Downright embarrassing.

The tribulations first started when he and several other lieutenants had been sent undercover at Federation military academies spanning countless sectors. His task as a sleeper agent was to look for high security data that could be passing through. He got lucky; a fellow professor let it slip that a special delivery—a “unique relay consignment”—from the next sector was soon to arrive. He was told that teachers would help carry the delivery, once it landed at their academy, to the next sector.

It surprised him that something of such importance would be traveling through such a backwater, broken-down area. The resources were meager, the technology was obsolete, and the training vessels were of the barest of bones, running on outdated systems. It was clear the lack of funding from the capital was to blame, but he supposed that was what made this downtrodden sector the perfect choice; no one would suspect it.

Seinen hadn’t known it then, but he had come across his soon-to-be adversaries in passing not too long after his discovery. He wouldn’t see her or her two friends again for several days after that, when he and his brother enacted their plan just before the teachers’ trek commenced. The students would have graduated in a month’s time, but instead they took up the teachers’ mission in their steed, sprinted away with the data, commandeered a battered ship while their academy fell to ruin, and jumped away.

He grinned in recollection. What a thrill the chase had been!

Now at last, she was here. In his room and in handcuffs. She was the data the Federation needed to win, and she wasn’t going anywhere.

His eyes flicked to her and then back to the view outside. This one here, sitting on the ground in front of him? Dealing with her had been the biggest enjoyment of all. The Kestrel’s Engineer had played the most challenging game. And now, that game was coming to an end.

* * *

A couple hours earlier, his brother and his assigned crew had returned with the unconscious engineer in tow. Seinen almost didn’t believe the report when a breathless ensign had pinged his door, the soldier’s eyes bright with anticipation and cheeks flushed from sprinting.

“Captain Weir, XO Weir and his crew have captured the engineer!” the soldier huffed. “They’re still in the hangar bay!”

It wasn’t graceful or becoming of a leader, but he almost leapt from his desk and sped through the halls to find a tall, lean man standing in the hangar. His short sandy blond hair was unkempt, but his long, brown sweater coat was tidy. He didn’t wear anything that would have suggested he was a Rebel, and yet an unconscious woman was slung over one shoulder, her hands tied behind her back.

“You’re back!” The excitement from their recent achievement caught up to Seinen, relief slipping into his tone. No sooner than the words left his lips did he realize the other soldiers had witnessed his outburst. He cleared his throat. “How was the journey?” He hadn’t anticipated any calamity to befall his brother, but he couldn’t deny that he had sent Elliot on a treacherous assignment.

“Ah, brother, I see you’ve heard the good news. I’m alive and well, and we achieved our goal: getting her and neutralizing their ship. That’s all that matters.” His green eyes gave off a warmth as he saw Seinen. He condescendingly patted the woman’s head. “We need to see if she can tell us anything useful after a trip to the medbay.”

The Executive Officer turned to the soldier at his right side, a pale woman whose height was just at his shoulders. She acknowledged his gaze, long blonde hair swishing with the movement. “Cadence, go to the lab. Inform Dr. Caudel that we’ve secured the data and to prepare for data extraction and interrogation.”

She saluted and ran off without a word.

The man turned back to gaze up at his brother. “It would be a good idea to have analysis calculations running in the background during interrogation to save time. But maybe Little Miss Data knows the primer sequence to pull it out, or where the data was implemented. Or, better yet, both. The computations wouldn’t take too long then, and we will have just as good as won this.”

As Seinen nodded, the Executive Officer tossed him a small satchel.

Seinen’s eyes widened as he lifted the straps. His hand dove into the bag grasping for its contents. One after another, he pulled out seven empty, thin canisters.

“Elliot, what did you _do_?” He hoisted each metallic canister in his hand, feeling its weight before grabbing another one. “Did you use _all_ the gas I gave you?”

“Yeah,” Elliot stated matter-of-factly.

He shook his head. “Those extra canisters were in case something happened to the others. If you used all of them on her, that makes the anesthetic weaker and it’ll stop being effective! We might not be able to use it here.”

His brother shrugged, green eyes shifting to the soldiers who happened to be in the vicinity of his scolding. They knew better than to react, and so did Elliot. “You’re right. I had considered that. But we didn’t have any decent firepower and it was difficult to anticipate just how hard it would be without it. We had to be careful, and I ended up using up the rest of the sleeping gas to be sure she wouldn’t wake up.” Elliot turned to follow after his subordinate, hefting the engineer higher onto his shoulder. As he reached the door he stopped, turning to stare at Seinen, eyes hard. “No matter the cost, right, brother?”

Seinen paused while staring at the engineer’s visage. “…Right. No matter the cost.” He followed Elliot, resigned to carry out his duty.

The doctors took advantage of her unconscious state to hook her up into their medbay. Within two hours, numerous samples were collected from her body and then sequenced.

Dr. Caudel handed two small titanium vials to Seinen and Elliot. “Captain Weir, XO Weir, these vials contain a microchip of the DNA sequencing we obtained from the prisoner. The data’s somewhere on there, but it’ll take a significant amount of time to figure out where. I’m talking on a scale of days, if not weeks. Computations are already running, but just in case something should happen to the ship, it’s best you both keep a copy.”

The two officers nodded and Seinen gave the signal for interrogation proceedings to begin.

Without an official interrogation room, something makeshift had to be conjured up with equipment from the laboratory. Elliot unceremoniously dumped her onto the chair and jerked the straps tight, not caring how they dug into her arms. Seinen looked on, opening his mouth before snapping it shut, resisting the urge to comment.

Elliot jerked the final strap across her forehead tight, locking her head in place.

Seinen crossed his arms. “She’s still under the influence, she’s not going to have any strength to rip them open when she wakes up.”

Elliot jabbed her shoulder. “Hey, wake up!” He turned to his brother. “Can’t take any chances, you should know that by now,” he asserted before turning back to trying to wake her up, his voice rising as each prod became rougher.

“When did you last administer the gas?”

“Three hours ago. She was starting to talk back.”

“Well, that’s why she’s unresponsive. The half-life is a little longer than that.”

“Not everyone is a chemist like you,” Elliot snorted, giving one last shove to the engineer’s shoulder.

Everything was fully set up within twenty minutes. Elliot sat a ways away, sprawled in a chair squarely behind his brother’s. He had been eyeing the sleeping woman constantly, scowling.

Seinen patted his shoulder before walking up in front of her.

“Engineer, it’s time for you to wake up.” It took a few minutes of him gingerly shaking her shoulder for her to become responsive.

The first thing she saw was his face. At first, she didn’t seem to recognize him, slowly blinking and still groggy. When she registered who it was, the sleepiness dissipated. She scowled at him and took stock of her surroundings and bindings.

“ _Where is my crew_?” she demanded, jerking against the straps as she lunged forward. “What have you done to them?!”

“Happy to see you too.” Seinen’s lips curled as his eyes narrowed. “I have a few things I’d like to ask you first.” In an adjoining room behind where the engineer sat, Dr. Caudel and his assistants waited. With a flick of his hand, Seinen signaled for the mind control device to be turned on.

At his signal, a silver cube of no more than a few feet in size began to emit a low and steady hum as it powered up. As it reached full power, the lines running through it shifted to an indigo purple, casting an unmistakable hue across the room.

Everyone could see the prisoner begin to fight against her restraints as the color darkened. She balled her fists, making no sound as she tried to still her trembling. Her serious gaze would occasionally flick back and forth from the machine to Seinen, almost as if challenging him to do his worst—she was not scared.

Seinen cocked his head to the side as he observed her struggle to conceal her trepidation. “So, let’s begin with something obvious, just to make sure the machine is working. Tell me your full name.”

The woman twitched even more, her mouth opening despite her visibly keeping a stiff lip and even stiffer jaw. He had seen this before several times with other people, this attempt to resist. But it wasn’t particularly pleasant to watch, especially now. This was why he thought interrogations were a necessary evil, and why he usually left these sorts of tasks to Elliot, who seemed much more willing to conduct them than he. However, tonight was a special occasion. The war would soon be over, and he had a very important guest he had been waiting for eons to talk to.

“P-Pell Abernathy.” She was betrayed by her own voice before she could trap the words behind gritted teeth.

Seinen glanced at the crew in the back and Dr. Caudel nodded; they had gained access to her mind. They just needed her to keep talking, and perhaps they would find the answers they sought.

“Confirm or deny that you are in possession of classified Federation data.”

And just like that, she stilled. Her dark eyes cleared in an instant. She gazed into his eyes and just…stared at him. With no squirming and a straight face, she immediately spoke, “I am.” Her expression was soft, but grew to chill and pierce him the longer she held it. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. He was supposed to ask her a question to which she would brazenly refuse and struggle against her mental and physical confines. He was expecting some form of resistance, _anything_. She wasn’t someone who would just give up. He looked back up to the doctor, who gave him no different reaction. The machine was still running. If he had looked a little closer at the prisoner instead of at the doctor, he would have noticed her suppressing a satisfied sneer.

“…Tell me where it is.”

“Where you’ll _never_ be able to get to it in time: my DNA.” Another forthright response. Dr. Caudel was confirming in the background that the machine worked fine. She was telling the truth. Seinen’s face shaded with suspicion. _Just what is this woman playing at?_

He took a step closer. It had been a while since he first found out she had been carrying the data. Their game of cat and mouse had increased to such extremes that Pell, a trained researcher, made the ultimate gambit of converting it into her DNA. When he realized what she’d done, he’d been shocked. But, against his better judgement, he had found himself impressed by his adversary’s risky move. Here was a truly worthy opponent. “Oh yeah? Into which cells was the data inserted?”

She beamed at him. “I don’t know!” A smug grin grew on her face while her eyes glimmered in defiance. “The Federation is weak for now, but we have never forgotten protocol. Raise your standards.”

He cursed to himself, hopes of obtaining the data promptly beginning to crumble. Walden’s Rule set a precedent for any data being converted and carried within humans. For the carrier’s safety, they must not know 2 key pieces of information should they get caught: which cells housed the DNA, and the primer sequence to help pull the data out.

“I wouldn’t act so confident if I were you, Engineer.” He crossed his arms. “You’re still trapped here. If you don’t have what I want, we’ll just have to analyze your cells by brute force.”

The last thing he expected was a chuckle from her.

“What’s so funny? We have a very good medbay.”

“Spend all the time you want trying to get it from me. We both know that’ll take too long. Go ahead with that high throughput sequencing and analysis. Just try and crack the encryption, too, while you’re at it. It doesn’t matter how good your tech is. Forces are already starting to gather in Sector 1. The capital’s armada is just waiting to fuck you up. I thought you wanted to win this war, asshole?”

“Hey!” Elliot barked from behind Seinen. “Watch it!”

“Should I, though?” Pell feigned indignation. “Your brother here doesn’t seem to mind nearly as much as you do.”

Seinen could feel heat beginning to build up in his chest.

“That’s _enough_!” Elliot yelled, standing up and speeding towards her. Seinen raised his arm to block him from reaching her, expression schooled to bland disinterest. It was imperative not to get riled at every small thing. If he was as easily provoked as his brother, Seinen wouldn’t have lasted as long as he did as a leader. He sized her up.

“Do those restraints hurt, Engineer?” Seinen asked, dodging the topic. “Perhaps they’re limiting the blood flow to your brain, if you think that is a good way to talk to the people who hold your life in balance. Maybe they should be loosened.”

Before Elliot could object, Seinen reached down towards her wrists and jerked the straps tighter. Pell grimaced.

Elliot gave a satisfactory hum as he sat back down. Seinen reached to adjust the strap at her head.

Finally, he had his chance. After more than a year of almost moments, she was all his. The closest he had ever gotten to that in the past was pinning her against a wall at a Zoltan research facility, but that was different. There had been a gun between them, and yet she still somehow managed to almost kill him.

It was hard to tell with the cool air cycling through the vents, but her hands felt cold. Her hair was soft, he noted as he tightened the strap, resulting in a chilling glare from the captive. _Just like before_. He had felt her hair only once—when he had knocked her out with gas and placed a tracker in her hair tie. It didn’t last for long, only a few hours, but it had been enough for his men to get an idea of where their ship had gone. From that point on, that back and forth between her and him was normal, and it was nice to circle back to how it all began.

He planted a tracker in her hair tie. She destroyed the hair tie.

She booby-trapped a cache, rigging a false beacon to display a Federation signal so she could buy her ship time. He ordered several auto drone scouts to position themselves far ahead of himself so they could alert him of any FTL travel. He made doubly sure the drones would cloak themselves immediately as their drive charged up.

He hadn’t gone easy on them. She was only just getting started.

 _This doesn’t make any sense!_ He once thought to himself with both frustration and a detached sense of amusement. How could he be so invested in this war yet grow an overwhelming sense of torpor at it over the years? How was he perfectly willing to be ruthless only to pull back later?

If he was told to choose between the data and her life, well, hadn’t he already made his choice? She had to be alive, after all, for their game to continue. Though, he certainly didn’t doubt that he wasn’t _too_ much of an influence in keeping her alive. She had her own methods at survival, as did he. And that brought up the third contradiction: how he looked at himself and herself less in the context of Rebel and Federation, but rather as opponent versus opponent. The game started to matter more than the goal. The chase more than the data. But then…what if she _was_ the data? Things had been evolving, and to him he felt that they had long since crossed the boundary of normal rivalry. He had let that feeling stew for weeks, if not months, at this point. Seinen didn’t yet have an answer. All he wanted at that moment was to touch her, to run his hand through her hair again, well aware that his feelings for her had deepened far beyond their original starting point.

As he latched the final strap right behind her head against the seat, he was lost in thought, staring at her hair. She had always kept it in a pristine bun when he had seen her in their encounters. Her appearance had never been anything short of immaculate. But after being manhandled her hair was unkempt, the bun loosening more as she fought against the rigidity of her head straps.

As he pulled away, he didn’t notice that he let a finger brush and twirl her hair.

Pell’s startled eyes darted towards his hand.

Seinen looked back at the doctor, who gave a grim look. Mind control was forcing Pell to tell them the truth, and if she didn’t have those two pieces of data, then finding the data via brute force techniques would take too long. They only had hours as they made their final push to invade.

“Not to mention,” Pell almost mumbled now, eyes downcast and bashful, “the data has been encrypted. Probably a one-time pad, but who’s to say?” She leveled with Seinen. “The Federation is falling, for now, yes, but do you really think they have _zero_ security?”

Seinen sneered.

“I got into your academy all those months back, didn’t I? As far as I’m concerned, there’s nothing but holes in your defenses.”

He leaned in, his hands supported by the armrests of her chair, fingertips at her fingertips, their eyes locked in a silent battle. “So, do me a favor,” he bridged the gap between them even more so that their foreheads were almost touching, mouths mere inches, “and just tell me _everything_ you know.”

A pause, and then an even bigger grin. She leaned against his forehead, to which he all too willingly pushed back. They exchanged grins that reached from one ear to the other.

“Well, of course. I’m under the effects of mind control right now. I’ll tell you anything.”

“… _Anything_?”

“ _Any. Thing._ ”

_“Tell me,” long ago he had asked her, outside on the academy’s grounds, with ash and cinders whimsically fluttering around them as bombs went off, “what is an Indian like you doing here in the boonies? This is just about one of the worst places you could choose to live in. You realize that. I saw how others treated you. You can’t tell me it’s not an issue. I don’t understand.”_

_“This…this is my home. There’s nowhere else for me to go,” Pell had responded, trying to keep her tremors under wraps as she aimed a gun at his chest. It was clear she was trying to distract him, to buy time for her comrade who actually had the data and was trying to get help. But Seinen received word from Elliot that he had found her friend and was dealing with him. So, to keep himself occupied, he entertained himself with her presence, and asked her the questions that had been in the corners of his mind since he last saw her._

_The plan had already been in full swing at that point. He was supposed to have rendezvoused with Elliot_ if _he actually had gotten the data. But the teachers who he was told would have the data did not. Seinen had been dashing through the halls, looking for any remaining faculty who could have been involved in the ploy when he saw her and her two friends recovering from several chunks of the ceiling falling on top of them. He remembered catching sight of them days prior, when Pell had fallen onto his path after being purposefully tripped by another student._

_A young man with blond hair helped up another man with black hair, telling him to be careful not to crush what was in his pocket. He said they needed to find a teacher ASAP._

_Seinen acted on a gut feeling and called out to them, “Hey, what do you have there in your pocket?”_

_The three froze on sight of him. The blond man yelled something in that rough dialect that had been grating on Seinen’s ears for months ever since he arrived. The trio sprinted off, and Seinen confirmed they were his next targets._

_He should have known right then that dealing with them would prove arduous. He ended up losing them almost immediately. It figured, he had spent all his free time exploring, but his familiarity was no match for a native’s._

_Luck struck him once more when he left the building and heard someone shouting, “Brian, come back! GIVE THAT BACK!”_

_It was the same woman from before. She drew her gun with quaking hands. He was several meters away from her, but he noticed. Every step he took towards her, she took a step back. Seinen wasn’t too worried about the gun—or her—for that matter. Not only had Elliot picked up a peculiar relic for him from a Federation soldier—a human-sized Zoltan shield—in the past, but also this woman was new to the art of war. Here he was, the “bad guy,” approaching her one step at a time, and still she could not bring herself to pull the trigger._

_“P-professor, you’re—”_

_“I’m not your professor.”_

_He was closing the gap between them now. Seinen took a closer look at her. Fear was obvious in her eyes and shaded her whole expression. If she could make it out of the academy alive, she’d get used to the danger. She’d grow numb from taking lives. He had long since been desensitized himself, to the point of ennui._

_She was no longer just a student, but an enemy. Here was a soldier still fresh and raw, yet to be molded by the harshest teacher that was life. And yet…something about her irked him. Forget life, he was going to show her first hand that Rebels weren’t people to be messed with, Federation propaganda be damned._

_She didn’t have the data and was scared witless, so he didn’t need to get rid of her. He just needed to knock her out and plant a tracker in the event that her location would provide valuable information down the road._

_Seinen took one last step before he hurled himself towards her and—_

Elliot coughed.

Seinen blinked and pulled back. How long had they been in a trance? He took reign of his thoughts and emotions, hoping none of them had visibly shown. Pell stopped smiling.

“ _What do we do with her for now?_ ” Elliot contemplated as he switched from English to a smoother, softer language incomprehensible to all but the two of them.

_“If we can’t get the data from her, we just have to keep her away from the Federation.”_

_“Well, murder is always an option. If we can’t make her brain-dead and find where the data is, we can just make her permanently dead.”_

Seinen wanted to object to such a notion; the nagging feeling inside him told him he didn’t quite like the idea of killing her in any form. Before he could respond, Elliot switched back into English. “Tell me if your ship has a clone bay.”

“It didn’t when I was still there, but there’s no telling what my crew is up to now. We’ve pulled off more surprising things, haven’t we?”

“Does your ship have the means to backup your DNA?”

A quiet, victorious smile. “We do.”

“How’s that possible if you don’t have a clone bay?” Seinen interjected.

Pell shrugged. “We picked it up as loot. The point is, it would be a bad idea to kill me, _gentlemen_.”

Seinen racked his brain. Judging by the battle reports he had been getting in the interim while Elliot was away, her ship didn’t appear to have the means to back up her DNA. Federation formations were still weak and nothing had changed in their battle plans to give them any overt advantage against the mounting Rebellion.

But Pell had no capacity to lie to him at this moment, meaning that her DNA was stored somewhere on her ship. That would mean they could still deliver the data if they reached a Federation stronghold and requested scientists to pull her DNA data from their drives. Perhaps they had backed up her DNA but had no way to extract it separate from the clone bay mechanics. He suspected that Pell had not wanted to divulge any information to her crew out of the fear they might get captured. In the end, it didn’t matter. After Elliot’s hit-and-run attack on Pell’s ship, her crew was alive but couldn’t move, so even if they found a way to get to a Federation hub, there was no guarantee of anything. It could still be too late regardless.

Everything was falling into place.

 _“She’s right.”_ Seinen shook his head, reverting back to their mother tongue. _“We can’t take any chances, Elliot. Take her to my room.”_

_“…Wait, what? You need to help with strategy and last minute preparations. We don’t have time for you to be her guard.”_

_“Yes, we do. You’re just as capable as I am, and all the soldiers are managing the preparations just fine. She’s also too important to just be left with some ensigns, and they have to be completely focused on their roles right now. If I leave her to you, I_ know _you’re just going to keep abusing the gas. It will stop working, and it takes time to make different variations of the gas. You don’t want her running around during the actual fight, do you?”_ Seinen placed a hand on Elliot’s shoulder and looked at him earnestly _,_ “ _I can handle her. Trust me. Bring some guards here so she can be escorted to my room.”_

Elliot searched for something in Seinen’s eyes before acquiescing. “ _Alright. But the second she starts acting funny you alert me, okay? I’m not kidding. You should know how unpredictable she can be by now. Don’t you remember the time you saw her break through a window?”_

Seinen nodded. _“I remember everything perfectly, and I still want you to trust me. I’ll be careful, I promise.”_

Dr. Caudel came in and shut off the machine. Pell’s shoulders slumped in relief as her body loosened from the tension. As the scientists left the room, Elliot headed out to go make arrangements to relocate her.

It was just the two of them now.

Seinen sat back down and studied her, chin in hand.

Pell met his challenge.

“You know, I think these restraints could be tighter.”

Seinen was taken aback. “What?”

“You heard me. Tighten them.”

He wanted to tell her that she was just asking to have the circulation cut off from her limbs. How much tighter could those restraints get after what he and Elliot did? Instead he chose to keep it in as he stood up, walked towards her, and peered down.

“You sure?”

“…Yeah.” There was no edge to her voice now.

He reached down, letting his fingers brush upwards along her hand. Seinen fixated on Pell’s eyes, who kept hers trained on his hands.

He stopped at her restraints.

And eased their hold on her.

Seinen followed suit with the one on her head, completely undoing it.

“That tight enough for you?”

“…Yeah.”

The restraints were loose enough that Pell could have simply slid her hands out. Instead, she chose to keep her hands on the armrests.

Seinen turned around, not wanting to make any more eye contact. “They’re going to be here soon. Tie your hair back up while you still can.”

She paused again. “Really?”

“I didn’t see it happen. Now hurry.” He almost snapped the words without intending to. Why was he getting so agitated?

Nothing, then Seinen heard the sound of fingers brushing through hair and the occasional rustle. By the time Elliot came back with guards, Pell’s hair was once again in order, her hands back in the lax confines.

* * *

The guards made quick work of releasing Pell from the chair when they arrived with Elliot, the straps traded for cuffs. Elliot observed her all the while; Pell’s gaze never left Seinen’s as her arms were contorted behind her back.

Two guards flanked her on either side as the entourage made its way through metallic hallways lit with fluorescent lights to Seinen’s office. Elliot lagged behind her, on the prowl for any deviant behavior. Pell huffed out a breath. _It’s not like I can fight back against four men while I’m in handcuffs. Sem and Charlie trained me but I’m not_ that _good._ This was overkill. She would at least wait until she only had to deal with the one strutting in front of her in a private room.

Seinen, the _captain_. He was a captain now, she had to remind herself. When they had first met over a year ago, he was nothing to her, just the new advanced chemistry teacher hired to assist the current, overworked professor.

Her professor had introduced a tall and thin young man with a gentle smile and clear eyes. The new professor would take half of his students and handle his own class but would stop by to assist whenever necessary. She wasn’t part of that half, but whenever he had come in to be a substitute he seemed patient with her and her classmates. He had gone by a different last name, but Professor “Atouille” lectured with refreshing expertise. The only time they had really talked was when she had been tripped and landed in front of him. She appreciated his attempt to help. For the most part, the staff weren’t keen on stepping in to deal with any of the discrimination or hazing students took part in against her and others. Deep down, even they resented that several Indian-heavy sectors defected and aided the Rebellion, taking it out in small ways against Federation citizens who just happened to share the same skin color. His offer to write a report restored some faith. He really did seem like he cared.

What a fucking _liar_ he was!

That whole time it was all just a giant façade. Xander had told her and Brian, on the day Brentbridge was attacked, that he overheard the new professor talking in a language that was foreign sounding compared to the regional dialects. The whole school had been on edge as Rebel influence spread even further. People were almost expecting their home sector to collapse as well. As far out as their sector was, the fear was ever-present.

But what did she and Brian say when Xander brought his concern to them? They rationalized that it was too far-fetched. Projecting her own experiences, she had even gone so far as to say that maybe he wanted to hide his dialect for fear of discrimination. An innocent citizen from a Rebel-controlled sector might want to keep his origins quiet. He taught rather well too, it seemed.

But nope, he was just a Rebel bastard. He turned from kind professor to a Rebel in a matter of seconds. While the three of them had been walking to their labs, an explosion erupted, and soon after, Xander had been tossed a tiny microchip from an instructor and was told to run. When the ceiling collapsed on the three of them, and Xander was helped back up, she heard _his_ voice.

“Hey, what do you have there in your pocket?”

Seinen’s eyes, dark brown to the point of black, were no longer clear and soothing, but absolutely voracious, staring daggers into Xander and the pocket the microchip was in. She had never seen anything even close to that from him before, and when he encountered her outside later…

Pell blinked to remove her mind from the past. She focused on his back, the suit jacket accentuating his muscles and form, the coattails and the flair with which he so naturally walked. Soldiers would salute him and his brother as they passed while they gawked at her, the lone Federation fighter, a prisoner forced to walk with her hands bound. A stake drove into her heart. She felt shame and embarrassment every time a new soldier stopped to witness the proceeding.

She’d lost. He’d won. Not that she was going to concede. She might have been taken, but it did not appear her crew was on board this ship. There was hope in that fact. She wouldn’t know for sure unless she got confirmation, but if her crew was out there, they could still get help to pull her DNA from the storage banks. And then, they could deliver the data. The Federation could still win. As for her…

 _…Am I going to die here?_ The thought fell into her mind like a single drop disrupting a clear pool. The Federation would need to destroy this ship in order to win this war on the capital. It was possible some ship besides her crew would come here first. They wouldn’t know she was on board if they engaged in battle. Her fellow Federation brethren would inadvertently take her down with the enemy. And her own crew couldn’t get her yet, the mission took priority. Even if she so badly wanted to see Xander and Brian’s faces one last time…it wasn’t looking good for her. Would death be like the nothingness of sleep?

 _No! I can’t think like that right now! If I do, any small chance will become absolutely zero!_ She shook her head. Pell could hear Elliot snicker. _I’m not going to die!_

 _But…will he?_ She looked wistfully at the back walking in front of her.

In the same vein, the Federation winning would result in this ship’s destruction. In other words, the death of its captain and crew. She took stock of this ship as they walked to his office. She hadn’t seen any discernible weapons to make judgements from. She didn’t have to, though. She knew her own ship’s setup. They stood a fighting chance. If her crew could get to this ship, surely they would rescue her with their teleportation bay, and let loose their firepower. Victory could be had. Victory that she would have contributed to at the cost of his murder.

The Federation would win in that case. So why did the thought of him dying seem so upsetting and riddle her with guilt? Surely it was just because she had dealt with him for so long. His clever ploys, that roguish smile. Brian and Xander were her best friends and comrades she would absolutely die for. But when it had come to studying and booksmarts, she had felt alienated. They accepted her for her background and who she was, but so did Seinen. He was her true sparring partner in times of mental anguish. Where would she be without him? Who else would she learn so much from?

She glanced once more at his back, how fit he was despite being so svelte. His hair was immaculately groomed—impressive considering he had black wavy curls in all directions—just like it had been when he was a professor. He smelled like fresh linens, a scent that had encompassed her when he tightened her straps earlier. Seinen smelled like that when he had pinned her to the wall too, but she had been too busy trying to get out of that sticky situation to appreciate it then. But, even as he had tied her restraints tighter just to spite her, she distracted herself with the fragrance. And his _hands_ , god, his hands. Slender and dexterous, like the rest of him. Pell told herself she was just messing with him when she asked him to tighten her restraints. It didn’t matter that she wanted to be enveloped in fresh sheets and have skilled hands brush against her. Perhaps…he had been thinking the same way too?

Her face was getting hot. She was breathing a smidge heavier.

While trying to control her breathing, she lost track of her surroundings until she collided into Seinen’s dark uniform.

“Hey!” Elliot’s harsh tone rang as he yanked her back by the uniform collar. “You _that_ excited to go in?”

Seinen put his palm on the entry pad by his door. As it scanned him, he turned to give an inquisitive stare.

Pell stared back at him with all the strength she could muster. But it was bright out here in the halls, and she got flustered. Hopefully he mistook it as a consequence of Elliot pulling her by the collar.

The door opened and Seinen turned around. If her face had betrayed anything, he didn’t let her know that he knew.

Seinen waved his hand to the soldiers and nodded at his brother, who gave a parting glare to the prisoner.

The door slid shut. Alone at last.

Pell glanced around as Seinen walked towards one of the three portviews lining the back wall. The light wasn’t on in the room, but with the shifting blue and white light coming from outside, it wasn’t pitch black. A desk was a few feet in front of her. To her far right, a door and a wardrobe. To her left, a small, neatly arranged bed aligned with the corner of the room, with a minimalistic nightstand. The lack of furniture made the rectangular room seem spacious. _That’s it? You call this an office?_

“So, this is an office fitting of such a high ranking Rebel, huh? Why the bed? Don’t tell me this is your bedroom too. You have nothing better to do but work all day?”

“Bold words coming from someone who was a little _too_ diligent in her studies back at the academy, Engineer.” Seinen’s retort slipped out effortlessly as he peered outside the window.

Pell snickered and shook her head. “Well, where am I supposed to sit? There’s only one desk chair, although I do love the idea of sitting in it.”

“On the floor, of course. Where else do you think you belong? Just sit there and let me be at peace for a couple of minutes.” He waved his hand at her too, as if that was going to work on her.

Pell’s gaze drilled holes into his back and she plopped herself down where she stood by the door. Yes, this was a good wake up call from her imagination earlier. This was the man he really was. Unpredictable, unreadable. He was a Rebel and she was a Federation soldier. She had a duty to uphold. The Federation absolutely needed to win this assault on the capital if it were to survive. The cost didn’t matter, even if she and everyone she cared about perished. But if there was a chance—even the smallest of chances—to see her crew again, it would do her well to be on alert while she was here. It would be in her best interest to keep that in mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pell: Bitch.  
> Elliot: Blocked.  
> Pell Wait, wait, unblock me, I need to tell you something  
> Elliot: Unblocked.  
> Pell: Bitch
> 
> Aaand so another story kicks off! Was the chapter everything you were expecting an FTL fanfic to be? Did you have a favorite scene in the chapter? I'm especially curious on what you thought about the flashback that happened mid-interrogation. I personally really was happy with how smoothly it transitioned. Feel free to let me know your thoughts and feelings down below.
> 
> Some info pertaining to the data:
> 
> Data can be converted into DNA. It is actually a process that is currently being developed as we speak. The whole sequencing part was handwaved in the fact that I sped it up. It would normally take much longer than 2 hours. Maybe a whole day or so. The time scale will be more realistic in my main story I have been planning for a while now. The part about trying to crack the encryption and get the data out was accurate in that it'd take weeks. The point is: this is a game where faster than light travel is a thing. Me hand-waving this shouldn’t be too egregious in the grand scheme of things.
> 
> I do have my own theories on what the data is, and thus there is an answer to that age-old question. But, given what this story is about, I decided there was no real reason to go into it at this time. The game doesn't care, do I have to in my romance smut fic? Probably not.
> 
> Have a nice day!  
> 


	2. The War Wages On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pell tries to learn more about the current state of her crew. Seinen is having none of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I found this google doc script that lets me post a lot easier to AO3...I just wish it handled line breaks and I didn't have to go manually add them in...
> 
> Special shout out to my first comment, Laced_Up :3
> 
> Special thanks to my betas Ghosteh, Karios, Space Aqueerius, Charlye, AzonicFantasist, RillaOfIngleside, and Urisarung

“You never did tell me where my crew is,” Pell broke the silence with her demand. “So, where are they?”

Seinen rolled his eyes. “When did you become the jailer, Engineer?”

A few days ago, intel had been dispatched that a certain Kestrel-class ship was approaching capital borders. He certainly couldn’t have that and ordered for the data to be taken and the ship to be rendered immobile. Seinen hadn’t felt like killing her crew. He’d rationalized it to Elliot, and himself, by claiming that fighting them could prove risky.

He’d told himself lies, that it had nothing to do with Pell Abernathy’s attachment and love for her crew. That he had allowed her crew to be stranded in relative safety because the last thing he wanted to deal with was an intelligent, volatile engineer livid at the mistreatment of her crew, whether that engineer was in handcuffs or not.

Based on the reports, there had been a change in strategy to accommodate the flagship arriving from the Rebel stronghold’s shipyard. Any Rebel ships passing the sector where the crew was stranded would just be there to claim territory. They would only fire if given trouble, and a battered ship would give them no trouble.

 _They’d be outside of the main war zone_ , was the secondary thought he had. It was killing two birds with one stone. They would be out of his hair, and still _technically_ safe. He took relief in the fact that he managed to make everything work out in the end, because it had been a hassle.

Of course, even from the start, everything about the _Neriander_ and her crew had been troublesome. Even when they were weak, they never backed down.

_Seinen had found them again, this time at the edge of their home sector._

_“Target their shields first,” he relayed over the comm systems._

_Their pilot wasn’t experienced, and their engines were still underdeveloped. All shots landed and broke their shields. A fire erupted in their shields room, but not before their Artemis and Burst Laser Mk II returned the favor upon his ship’s protection._

_He resisted sending another volley back; there were other priorities he had to consider. He needed the data intact. “Deploy hacking to weapons.”_

_The drone targeted their weapons, keeping them offline as Elliot analyzed their ship’s data stores for any sign of the information they needed. With a fire spreading and their weapons offline, he expected them to focus on jumping away. That forced two of the three crew members to stay in their assigned rooms, unable to help repair the additional damage._

_He considered his options. Enough damage had been inflicted that he was confident they could complete their hack before the Federation ship could jump away, but he was tired of them. He had long since grown tired of chasing them, from the moment he realized they were his next targets. He wanted them_ dead _. Then the war would be won, and maybe he could finally have some peace._

 _“Leave them_ breathless _,” was his next command as a salvo was sent straight into the trio’s life maintenance room. If their oxygen was offline long enough, the fire would be put out, limiting damage that could destroy the ship before data was extracted. Knowing how weak their engines were, Seinen was confident they had not upgraded their oxygen deployment capabilities. Asphyxiating them in the process would just make it all the easier for him._

_With that final command, he redirected his crew to focus on repairing their shields as soon as possible, convinced the other ship had been sufficiently disabled. Or, so Seinen had thought. Because instead of scattering to repair damage, her crew had opened the airlocks all the way to their shield room and focused on repairing their oxygen. A few well-timed dodges bought them the precious seconds they needed to prep the drive and safely jump away, leaving an enraged Seinen behind._

He snapped out of his thoughts, glancing at her from the corner of his eye. She was staring at him, still sitting against the door. No fear in her eyes this time. When he turned to look at her, she looked away, avoiding his eyes. _So…I’m not imagining things._ He recalled how she acted during the interrogation and when she had made that shocking demand, and her expression when she had bumped into him.

The chase had gotten to her, too.

He turned to her and beamed another smile. The fact that Pell twitched under his gaze did not go unnoticed.

“Well,” he started, “I’m sure they’re fine. Why don’t you try and focus on where _you_ are right now, though?” He diverted the conversation entirely. “We won’t be going straight to the base, exactly. That’s the actual flagship’s job. The real one.”

Pell blinked. “The _real_ flagship?” She questioned. “You mean, we’re not on it?”

“No. Just a capital ship,” he knocked the hull, “but she looks just like the flagship, because she’s her sister ship, if you will. She’s a prototype of the flagship. Though, of course, you came here asleep, you wouldn’t know what the exterior looks like. So, while the ship I’m commanding certainly seems to be the Federation’s main obstacle, I’m actually just here to make sure none of the sorry remains of your precious Federation interfere and damage our fleet ships.”

“Oh, go to hell.” The statement sounded routine, an automatic response. He’d heard her say those words so many times. _Does she even mean them anymore?_ The words no longer seemed personal. It wasn’t like he could take all that she had done personally, either. They both had jobs to do. Goals to achieve at any cost.

“Oh?” Seinen clasped his hands behind his back and bent himself towards her. “Would you care to join me? Or would you say you are already there?”

Unlike her, he meant his invitation.

Pell averted her gaze. “I’m not joining you _anywhere_.”

The phrase stung a little more than it should have. He was talking to a different Pell than the one who had been strapped into the chair, that was for sure.

“Hm, well,” he sat down in his chair and stared at her with his chin on his hand. “You _will_ be joining me in the destruction of the Federation fleet. You’re not leaving this ship, that’s for certain. And your crew is no longer able to swoop in and save the day. Weren’t they the lynchpin?” A victorious smile crept into his face. “Now there’s nothing holding us back.”

“ _Shut_ the _fuck_ up,” she tried to growl.

Seinen twitched. Something glinted in his eyes as he opened his mouth before closing it and shook his head. “You don’t get it, do you? The Federation is a rotting corpse. There’s nothing but decay.”

Pell exhaled a slow breath.

If she was going to survive this, she needed to maintain her composure. Sure, it had been two sectors since they’d last had contact with the 31st relay team, but there was still a chance. _They could still be alive._

When she’d heard the plan for moving the data, she’d been impressed by the relay network of ships stretching across space. It allowed the data to be transferred quickly and efficiently across the distance, with the now second to last ship in the relay separating to find a new way to get to the capital. In theory, that should have been enough to keep them ahead of the Rebels. But somehow, they had discovered the plan. Pell and her crew, unwittingly the 32nd ship, now found themselves covering the final distance alone and unsupported. The fate of the other ships were technically unknown, though she knew deep down what the reality was.

It wasn’t time to grieve just yet, though. _I know something will change for the better. The Federation will live!_ She refused to believe that her crew wouldn’t come to get her eventually, wherever they were.

So, for now, she would play along and tolerate his ranting.

“Its citizens have long suffered from its inefficiency to manage its own domain,” his voice began to rise but had no mania to it, only unbridled passion. “It’s time for us to take back that power, distribute it evenly, and actually focus efforts at _equity_ instead of spreading superficial goodwill so thinly across _other_ races’ goddamn sectors.”

This time Pell did sigh. She felt her skin prickle with annoyance.

“Oh, like you’re some hero yourself.” Pell’s voice started to rise as well. “You talk about values, but then you go ahead and take me away from my crew. What did you do to them, you asshole!?” she choked on the question. “Did you put them in harm’s way? They _need_ me to survive. How could you?” There was an undertone of unseen, unacknowledged betrayal and an unspoken question: _If you cared about me, why did you do that?_

In her eyes, he had gone too far, because even between opponents, respect and a connection could be built.

Seinen fell silent. Then, his voice neutral and soft as he repeated her, “In harm’s way?” He wanted to clarify the situation, but thought better of it. _I can’t exactly tell her, out of all the plans I had thought up, this led to the least amount of casualties._ Would she even believe it? Or worse, would she read between the lines?

He was so deeply caught up in his thoughts that he began to hear a sound. He stopped and looked at Pell, who was still staring at him with that pained expression. She hadn’t made the noise. Then he heard it again: echoes of children’s laughter. As the sound played, he saw them in his mind, climbing over a younger him and Elliot. The image soon faded to one of a man, tied up in a chair, a sorrowful smile on his lips as a gun was placed to his forehead.

Seinen exhaled to get his focus out of his head and back on his opponent. This wildcard person of an opponent...How was he, the reputed master strategist, supposed to have predicted a year ago that the Federation would achieve even more intel on the Rebels? And that this one scrawny Kestrel ship would lay devastation to so many Rebel ships on its journey? That any of the year’s events would unfold?

He wasn’t sure what was more farfetched, the one ship growing to become a powerhouse that could turn the Rebel-Federation War around, or the fact that one of her crew members was a prisoner in his room.

He paused to collect himself. Now was not the time for him to get caught up in the past. If Pell was being tumultuous, he would be calm and orderly. He would show her how Rebels truly behaved, why they deserved to win. This was a golden opportunity. He would show her what she was missing out on.

He smoothed out his expression with a placid smile.

“Are you hungry, Engineer?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> E/N: 
> 
> Pell: WHERE IS MY CREW  
> Seinen: Here, I think you need to eat something. *hands a snickers*. You're not you when you're hungry  
> Pell: >:(((
> 
> Yes, this chapter is shorter haha. You'll see why soon~  
> For those aware of FTL lore, what did you think of my interpretation of how the data was supposed to get delivered? Trying to make FTL lore make sense, both within the canon and the literal definition of the word, is such a challenge lol.
> 
> For those who are fandom blind, welcome, and don't worry you're not missing much not having played the game! (though, I highly recommend it for any strategy fan, it goes to $2.50 on steam sales and one is coming up soon!)
> 
> I'm curious from all how they are liking/finding the dynamic between Seinen and Pell. Or what you all think Seinen has planned re: Pell's appetite ;)
> 
> Have a nice day!  
> 


	3. A Battle Between Two Intellectuals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seinen gives Pell a meal, which is absolutely unexpected. Then, the two argue, which should have been completely expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hello~ Check the very bottom of the E/N for a potential warning. The story does not have many warnings at all, but this chapter does. so take a look if there is something that you are concerned about and don't care about spoilers.
> 
> Hmm...Would you like to play a game, reader? The title of this story, as you may know, is "Last Remains." But, what remains am I talking about exactly? There are several, actually. I still need to finalize the total number (at least 8), but as you read you will come across both figurative and literal last remains. When the story ends, please let me know what you think they are. First two to tell me the correct answers win a prize. Just as a hint and to be fair, in chapter 1 and 2 there are 3 total. Maybe there's something here in chapter 3, maybe not. That's for you to figure out. Have fun!
> 
> Special thanks to my betas Ghosteh, Created, Urisarung, Charlye, Space Aqueerius, Karios, AzonicFantasist, and RillaOfIngleside

“Are you hungry, Engineer?” Seinen asked. “It must have been hours since you last ate, has it not?”

“You bastard—! Wait, what?” Pell appeared taken aback.

“Are you hungry?” Seinen repeated, the epitome of patience in the face of her startled distrust. “When did you last eat?”

“I…don’t know. I don’t know what time it is. I’m not even entirely sure what day it is, thanks to your brother.”

“It took you four hours to get here, and you’ve been here for about two and a half hours.”

“It’s…been about eight hours.”

“Then you must be famished.”

“I’ve gone longer without food. I’m _fine_.”

She shuffled around as she tried to find a more comfortable sitting position. Her stomach was hollow and her throat was parched, but it was nothing she hadn’t felt before. At least she was in no real pain besides the soreness from sitting on cold, hard ground with her arms locked behind her. The last thing she wanted was to admit a form of weakness. He’d probably give a harsh, derisive laugh and eat something in front of her.

“Is it so hard to come by food in the Federation navy? And I mean actual food, not those endurance bars or nutrient mush or what have you.”

She had no retort for that. He knew full well the state of the training ship she and her friends had commandeered when they had run away from their burning academy. It wasn’t exactly easy to get a piping hot, home-cooked meal out in the lawless sectors—thrown into disarray by the war and opportunistic pirates. Not to mention how hard it was to pay for it, with so many mouths to feed on the ship as time went on and their numbers increased to eight. The money was needed for more dire moments.

She doubted Seinen would understand, judging from the quality of his uniform and distaste for anything Federation, what it was like to be poor and hungry, to be starving but still be forced to fight on. It was amazing he managed to survive living in her sector, considering even teachers weren’t well off. This was just a new form of goading he was attempting; she needed to remain resolute in the face of it.

“I’m not hungry.”

Pell heard him tap his foot repeatedly before standing up. “Yes, you are. And I insist that you eat something. Nobody on my ship goes hungry.”

 _What? He was being serious?_ Her heart skipped a beat in disbelief. “I…I don’t…”

He pushed a button on his desk. “Ensign Cadence?”

A moment, and then a gentle voice, “Yes, Captain Weir?”

“Check to see if there’s anything leftover from the canteen that the prisoner could have.”

“Yes, sir. But…if I may ask…How would the prisoner eat? Will I need to be there while she eats as well?”

Seinen looked up from the comm before glancing back at Pell. Another idea, another smile.

“That won’t be necessary. Bring something here that she could eat without her hands.”

“Yes, sir.”

Ensign Cadence’s disconnect laid heavy in the air. Time for his next move.

“It’ll take some time for her to get here. Are you thirsty?”

“…I’m not…” She was about to stammer again, but she caught herself. She wasn’t expecting his sincerity. She should have just told him the truth, considering food was being brought. But old habits and a lifetime of training were hard to overcome. He sighed as he walked over to the tiny nightstand by the bed. He took the small cup resting upside down on the narrow neck of the pitcher and poured water into it. “I’m not thirsty,” she objected once more, despite eyeing the pitcher longingly. How was she going to drink it? What was she going to do? He would probably just dump it on her and make her sit there damp. _“There, satisfied now?”_ She could already hear him in her mind.

Or, worse, he would place the glass on the floor in front of her. _“Go ahead and drink,”_ he would taunt, _“just like the dog of the Federation you really are.”_

Seinen approached her. He knelt down. Pell winced and braced herself at the motion. Her eyes slammed shut in anticipation of getting drenched.

It didn’t happen.

“Here,” his voice was gentle and didn’t appear to notice her reaction. “And no, it’s not poisoned. You saw me take it from my nightstand pitcher.”

Eyes still closed, body still not wet. Expecting to find the glass on the floor in front of her, she opened her eyes to find him crouched beside her with the glass in hand near her face. He inched the glass slowly towards her mouth.

Flustered, she blurted, “How do I know you don’t just spike your drinking water with toxins to develop immunity?” Sure, killing her was a risk they couldn’t afford to take, but maybe he had gotten tired of her. Or maybe he and Elliot had grown bored and they had planned in that distinct language of theirs to poison her, shuffle her to their medbay, heal her, and then harm her again in some way. That would probably be more miserable than death.

Eyebrows furrowed, he cocked his head at her. “I do appreciate that you think I would be so thorough in my line of work, but no. I enjoy water—plain water—just like every other human.”

There was no more distance between Pell’s lips and the rim of the glass. Seinen looked expectantly at her.

The cool water shimmered tantalizingly in the dim light. She capitulated, closing her eyes, not wanting to see his expression any longer. She bent her head and opened her mouth, and felt him tilt the glass. The rush of the water invigorated her, and she found herself gulping it down fast. Seinen invited her to sip more by angling the glass as she drank it to nothing. As he tipped it, droplets of water fell down her chin and onto her lap. Pell could hear him mutter something under his breath and tilt the glass less as he saw the dripping water reflect light as it fell.

The glass now empty, Seinen pulled it away and chuckled as Pell opened her eyes at last. “‘Not thirsty’, huh? Here, let me get you another one.” He softly wiped at her chin with his right cuff and Pell was appalled at the wave of heat that the simple gesture sent through her. The contact brought memories rushing back of those same skilled hands brushing against hers earlier, and just like before, it left her craving more, and furious about it. She didn’t think it would actually _happen_ , much less this soon. And yet his eyes showed no malice; they only twinkled.

In no time at all, he had poured another glass and had resumed crouching beside her. Now less hesitant, she kept her eyes open as she drank, leveled with the hawk emblem on his chest, still too shy to inch her gaze upwards long enough to trade gazes.

She emptied the glass once more. Instead of pulling the glass away, Pell noticed a smile cross his face. She flicked her gaze to his eyes and said nothing as the two sat in silence.

“I—” he began.

The door pinged. Seinen rocketed back up.

“Captain Weir, it is Ensign Cadence. I have brought some food for the prisoner.”

He pushed a button on the control panel next to the door. Lights brightened around them, and Pell blinked rapidly to get used to the change. Pell saw the agitation at the surprise smooth out of his face in between her blinking. Seinen pushed another button. “Enter.”

The door slid open as the blonde entered, her hands cupping a covered bowl with a spoon on top. Her eyes dropped to Pell on the floor, and she bent down to put the bowl in front of her.

“Here you go,” the ensign spoke with no malice as she lifted the lid off and placed the spoon in. “I know you said something that she could eat without her hands, but I brought a spoon. Just in case.”

“Thank you, Aurelia,” Pell said. She had heard her name first while in a haze on the carrier. Aurelia had been the only one to temper Elliot, convincing him to let the Federation prisoner use the lavatory on board before getting knocked out again. If it weren’t for her, and the medbay on this ship, Pell’s bladder would probably have felt just as full as her stomach was empty.

Aurelia gave a small nod. “You’re welcome, Abernathy.”

“Pell.”

Aurelia gave a wordless acknowledgement before saluting her captain and leaving.

Pell eyed the soup: tomato soup with flickers of green herbs on top. Maybe Seinen did expect her to lap from the bowl like a dog. Though, at this point, the thought held less weight, the default response from a lifetime of learned suspicion. She was beginning to believe he wasn’t going to behave like that.

The realization made her uneasy.

“And, we’re back,” Seinen pushed the button to kill the lights and sat down at her side. He took the bowl in one hand and spoon in the other and began to stir.

Pell’s stomach knotted, and it wasn’t from hunger. She focused on the floor. “Why are you doing this?” Her throat felt tight, nervous that she had to be in this situation in the first place. It had been bad enough that she had been caught by Elliot. She hadn’t been expecting it. Even worse was how Elliot had treated her in front of his men on his ship in the brief moments she had been awake. Who knows what he had done or said while she was knocked out? Or what other soldiers had seen of his treatment of her when she was asleep and brought to the flagship?

Then there was that procession she had been forced to walk to Seinen’s office. That had been more than enough shame for a lifetime. And now, the only person on the ship that bore her no ill will had been ordered to bring a bowl of soup to her, a handcuffed prisoner sitting on the floor. What did Aurelia think would happen next? Surely not that her captain would sit down and spoon-feed a prisoner.

How was Pell supposed to reconcile that this captain was the same man who once pinned her to the wall with a gun on her, ready to kill?

What was even worse was that, amidst the indignity of it all, there was a part of her that found the idea _appealing_. In this moment, it was possible to forget that there was a war waging on and that they were at the center of it. It was just him and her and a meal. If it weren’t for the accommodations, that is.

Seinen kept stirring the bowl, eyes intent on the surface of the soup. “Why? Well…you said you’re hungry, right? This is the only proper way you can eat.”

“I never said I was hungry,” Pell’s voice was scratchy as she tried to tame the forming lump in her throat from smothering what she was about to say.

“You never said it explicitly, but you admitted it.” Seinen lifted some of the soup with the spoon and blew on it. “Now, say ‘Ah’,” he tried to joke with her as he held the spoon up to Pell’s lips, but she turned away.

“Don’t mock me. I don’t need your help. It was enough helping me drink. I won’t try anything funny. Just let me use my hands to eat, if you want me to eat so badly.”

Seinen dropped the spoon back into the bowl. “I’m afraid I can’t do that. Even if you give me your word, a captain always has to be a little bit cautious.”

“But I don’t _want_ this,” she pleaded, the situation finally getting to her. It was all too much. She was stuck here with the enemy. He was being nice when she didn’t expect it, didn’t even deserve it, if she was being honest. And yet, she found she didn’t mind him or his presence, as grating as she thought it would be, and now he was going to feed her soup? An absurd, surreal feeling coursed through her. She was hungry and felt completely disoriented. Pell did the only thing she could do in the confusion of the moment. Despite the gnawing in her belly and the complex feeling in her heart, it would be best to pull away as much as she could.

“Look,” Seinen ducked his head to catch her eye, his warm smile sending tingles down her spine. “I’m being serious when I say I don’t let anyone on my ship go hungry. And I’m aware of the fact that you’re tired, and knowing you and your trio’s sense of duty, I’d say your pride took quite a hit. You haven’t eaten in a while, though. I can practically hear your stomach rumbling. So, how about we just keep this between us? No one else needs to know about whatever happens in this room. Will that make you eat?”

Seinen stirred the soup once more, the aroma wafting into Pell’s nose. A familiar scent, one that Pell hadn’t come across in ages, registered, and Pell stared at the bowl.

“…You won’t talk about this with anyone else? Not even Elliot?”

Seinen ladled some soup back onto the spoon. “You have my word.”

Pell continued measuring up the food. “That smell. Is that what I think it is?”

He chuckled as he brought the spoon back to her lips. “Hm, you recognized it, did you? Why don’t you find out? Just have one sip. And if you’re still not hungry after that, then you don’t have to eat.”

Pell looked to him before opening her mouth, enclosing the spoon that Seinen tilted downwards.

The classic taste of tomato soup danced across her tongue. Sparks of herbs and spices that lit Pell’s face up in realization.

“You added _masala_ to tomato soup?” It was a taste she hadn’t had since she unceremoniously left home. She relished the nostalgic feeling in this prison cell of a room.

Seinen took advantage of the distraction and lifted another spoonful into her mouth. “Yep. There are a lot of Indians aboard this ship. Not a majority, but enough to give the dinner menu some variety.”

Pell, now so lost in thought that she didn’t even realize she was instinctively letting Seinen feed her, recalled her journey to Seinen’s office. She had been too busy walking down the hall trying to keep it together to notice that, indeed, there were a refreshing amount of soldiers with brown skin. It wasn’t often she had seen that on Federation ships during her journey, and there were only a handful of others like her back at Brentbridge. But that made sense to her at the time. If those other soldiers had parents like hers, they would have pressured them to seek out booksmarts and the security of a research position.

“You’re right,” she remarked, “I guess I shouldn’t be surprised though.”

“Not all Rebel ships are like this,” he chided her, “since Indians are still technically a minority. But they’re a sizable group.” He gave another spoonful.

“…Does this remind you of home?” Seinen asked with care. “The cooking, that is.”

He had half prepared himself for a situation where Pell remained petulant. The fact that she didn’t need any further coaxing after the smell and first sip drew her in was enough to guess what had won her over. He wasn’t sure what he would have done if that hadn’t happened. It had been over a decade since he had to spoon-feed Elliot, and an extra decade for anyone else, he realized as a bittersweet memory came into his mindspace. Elliot would eventually have complied from a combination of Seinen throwing his weight of being the elder brother around and also shoving the spoon in his mouth. But he couldn’t exactly replicate that here.

Pell swallowed. “Kind of,” she responded. “Brentbridge didn’t have food like this at their canteen. My mom would make it sometimes, but she made it even less after...after the riots in the Indian District. Regular tomato soup tastes just as fine, but some food just tastes bland. It feels lacking. Spice isn’t necessarily ‘burn your tongue’ hot, it just adds _flavor_. Wish more people added it to their cooking.” She opened her mouth again after her long-winded explanation.

“I agree, although I’ll admit I had gotten used to my _bland_ cuisine,” he pointedly put a little more force into the next spoonful in time with the word. “Before I had to captain ships with more diversity.”

“And what cuisine was that? You mean, the sector where you learned to speak that language with Elliot earlier? Where is that, anyway?”

That was a mistake. He had walked right into that question.

“That doesn’t matter. I’m referring to the cuisine I’ve had at your broken-down academy and elsewhere. It can all be fairly similar—and spiceless—once you pass a certain point in the sector clusters.”

“Why doesn’t it matter? What’s the big deal about where you’re from, anyway? You already know so much about me.”

“Oh, just focus on eating, won’t you? I see you’ve long since stopped arguing about being hungry or not.”

Pell avoided the next spoonful. “Where could you be from that’s that much worse than the Indian District? You don’t speak any language that I’ve ever heard from there. You’re not used to the cuisine either.”

 _I’m hungry, brother._ A child’s voice begged in Seinen’s mind.

“The Indian District riots are fairly recent,” Seinen muttered and pushed aside the thoughts, ladling another spoon. “Everyone heard about that fallout, but there are plenty of other sectors with their own problems stewing. You just never hear of them because they weren’t nearly as massive of an uproar. The Federation is immeasurably large, too large for its own good. You don’t even realize the half of it. A rebellion doesn’t just happen out of thin air.”

“Okay, like what?” Pell’s voice grew indignant. She was still willing to eat though, latching onto and cleaning the spoon off before receiving the next mouthful.

“Can you please just finish this soup in peace?”

“Tell you what, I’ll _completely_ stop talking and drink the rest of this soup as long as you spend that time telling me where my crew is.”

There wasn’t much left in the bowl now, Seinen saw what remained highlighted in the crystal blue light trailing outside. “Not a chance. It’s almost done now, anyway.” He held the spoon against the bowl and tilted the whole bowl, letting the liquid pour into her mouth as she glared.

She stared pointedly at his back while he stood up to place the empty bowl on his desk. “Why are you so scared to tell me? What do you think I am going to be able to do, if I know what happened to them?”

“It’s just another precaution, Engineer,” Seinen responded in a dry, tired voice as he opened his wardrobe. He pulled out a handkerchief and walked over to his pitcher to dab a small amount of water onto it. It was better to keep her as out of the equation as possible, though he was beginning to doubt his ability to do so if she was going to be so infuriatingly persistent.

“You can’t possibly think I’m going to somehow get out of these handcuffs and this room and bring down the entire ship in a blaze of fury, do you?”

“Not with me here, you won’t.” He bent down once more and wiped her mouth.

Pell’s eyes shone with a mixture of objection, annoyance, and gratitude at the gesture. “Then fine,” she spoke as Seinen tossed the handkerchief into his hamper, “I’ll continue asking you about your mysterious past.”

“God, is this what you were like with Elliot?” he turned to her, leaning against his desk with arms crossed. “Now I understand why he wanted to keep you knocked out.”

She smiled. “Nah, I saved this all up just for you. Besides, Elliot hardly gave me time to utter a ‘What the fuck’ before he’d knock me back out. So yeah, I’m going to keep asking where you’re from, because I doubt it’s such a closely guarded war secret that you’re going to go wasting any more gas on me.”

“You and your crew are nothing but giant headaches,” Seinen grumbled.

“And you and _your_ crew are a pain in the ass,” her face twisted into a snarl. “We should have squashed you like the pests you are ages ago.”

“Yeah, I’d like to see you try.” Seinen had the entire schematics of the capital ship and flagship memorized. He knew just what the ship was capable of. The _Neriander_ was strong, sure, and they had certainly proved their mettle over the course of their journey, but beat this ship in combat? Not possible. Which, to him, was all the more reason to keep her crew as far away from them and the fighting as possible.

“I know my ship, and I know my crew. They’ll get the job done, and put you all in the fucking ground, no matter _what_ ,” she almost spat out. “The Federation isn’t going to fall as easily as you think. It doesn’t even matter if I’m left here to die…” For a moment, Pell spaced out, eyes softening with melancholy as her previous thoughts came back to her, before revving back up. “But you’re still trying to get my crew killed, how can I stand by and let that happen?”

Seinen sighed. _I still don’t understand_. “What a waste of a galaxy-class engineer. To have such talent in the Federation is a lost opportunity. And I suppose, even if your life depended on it, you wouldn’t consider leaving your ties.”

“You should know better after all we’ve been through.”

He gave her a hard stare.

“I do. I know you very well. Just as you know me.”

Pell tried to keep her gaze level but looked away in the end. “...That I do.” It was one of several issues with being stuck in a private room with him. Pell’s mindspace was being tugged in multiple directions, and it was maddening.

“…In fact, I know you as well as I know the Federation, which will soon topple.”

Pell bristled at the side-stepping. “We’ll win. I can feel it.”

“You’re so adamant on that fact, Engineer, but you don’t sound all that convincing to me.”

“Yeah but that’s because you’re an asshole.”

He rolled his eyes. “But you have to realize: if the Federation cannot deliver the data, then the Federation is forced to surrender. Fighting back in spite of this will only lead to needless slaughter. Your crew is stuck, away from the battlefield, on the outside rim of their current sector. They could come and get you, but it’d be too late if the goal is reducing casualties.” He drummed his fingers against his lap. “You, however, are very literally in the center of the end stage of this little war game we have been playing. And they’re not invited.”

…Shit.

He’d let it slip.

He averted his gaze as nonchalantly as he could.

“So my crew…they’re safe?”

He couldn’t take it anymore, and stared back at her in challenge. Her crew this, her crew that. It was nothing short of aggravating to deal with someone so hyper fixated on one thing. He had already saved them. Wasn’t that enough? Why did she have to keep bringing them up like this, challenging his viewpoints along the way?

“Why do you care so much for them?”

“What a fucking question, how stupid do you have to be to—”

“Not your crew, the _Federation_.” Pell stirred at the clarification he made. “Your sector was in shambles. Barely functioning, but only because it held the largest military academy in the neighboring sectors.”

“So what if it _was_? That’s my _home_ you’re talking about!”

“Why are you so bent on risking your life, and by extension your precious crew, when the Federation never gave a damn about you until your ship carried their data?”

Pell seemed even more riled than before. “Because they’re still my home! They’ve still done _some_ things right!”

 _I can’t understand people like you_ , he thought as he suppressed rising memories. The more he attempted to understand her, the less he understood, yet this only intrigued him more. Something refreshing from his usual pace. A puzzle he was desperate to solve.

“Done _some_ things right?” Seinen exclaimed. “Why can’t they do _most_ , if not _all_ things right? They were your _government_ , they were _supposed_ to _protect_ you! Why are you making excuses for them?”

“Because—!”

“And the fact that you feel like you have something to prove has nothing to do with it, right?”

“…What?”

“That, if an Indian is able to contribute to the saving grace, maybe things will change for the better for once? Do you really think you can change such a stigma with just you and your small merry band?”

“That’s…”

“Nothing is ever that easy, I’m afraid. So why bother risking your life for a slim all-or-nothing cause? Why the hell did you go on such a suicide mission?” By the time the last few words slipped out, it was too late. They conjured the image of a woman smiling at him as she left their room for the last time, never to be seen again. It took some effort to submerge it again. “You want _actual_ change? Then you should be _okay_ with us winning! They _weren’t treating you right_!”

“ _That’s because—_!” Pell growled in objection before falling eerily silent. _It’s not like there was much purpose in living anyway._ She couldn’t tell him that the discrimination had made her parents fearful of her safety and career options. That, even though she didn’t want to become a researcher or engineer, they were “safer” bets than being put on the battlefield and potentially given the worst tasks and missions just based on an inherent bias.

“And if you don’t care about yourself, then what about the safety of your crew?! Do you think the Federation kept _them_ safe, Engineer?! _I’ve_ kept them more safe than they have!”

“ _THAT’S BECAUSE—_!” She cut herself off mid-yell. Her jaw was clenched and her eyes were absolutely seething. Like she had told herself earlier, the cost didn’t matter. Even if…even if she and _everyone_ she cared about perished.

Seinen had thought she would say something of substance to him, maybe potentially throw in some extra curses. But she appeared to be contemplating something.

“…I’d do anything for my home. Even if horrible things have happened.” Her voice was almost a whisper, seething despite the volume. “Isn’t that why you’re fighting too? Because _I’ll_ always jump up at the chance for a better tomorrow.”

“I told you, I fight because there needs to be a focus on humans. If we concentrated our efforts on humans instead of other species, who are doing just fine without us, we could actually shape up our side of the galaxy. Humans are hardly considered respectable as it is. To the rest we’re… _unremarkable_.” The words spat out like venom.

Pell just shook her head. “That’s not what I was asking. You’re giving me the same old Rebel propagandist drivel you and the rest of your lot get fed. I’m sick of hearing it. I’m asking you, once again, why _you_ fight.”

A knot tugged in Seinen’s stomach that he wasn’t willing to untangle.

“Oh yeah?” He raised his head from his cupped hand. “Well I’m sick of hearing the shit Federation soldiers spew, not to mention what they think of Rebels in general.”

“Shit? But it’s true.” Pell was bitterly confused. “You just admitted Rebels hate other races.”

“No, I didn’t,” Seinen snapped in frustration. “You’re not listening to me. What have you really heard about how Rebels treat other races? We’re primarily focused on dealing with our _human_ Federation counterparts.”

“You don’t even allow other races on your ships.”

“Like I said, a huge point of the Rebellion is to return power back to humans. Give them their own voice and space. Do you really think that will be possible if an Engi or Mantis comes along on a ship? The Federation would see their inherent skills and would be more than willing to kick a human out. They don’t have the same needs as humans do, so they’d be cheaper to employ as well. The Federation—and other races—think almost every race is preferable to a human.” Seinen almost sniffed at the notion. “But if the Rebellion has shown anything, it’s that humans are just as capable. We started a war, and _we’re winning it_.” A prideful smile quivered at his lips.

“But let’s forget about the Rebellion for a minute when it comes to discrimination. Even though the Federation aligns itself with races—ones that still put their own people first—those races aren’t even considered officially part of the Federation. In all actuality, Slugs, Mantises, Rockmen, and Laniuses aren’t a part of the Federation, not really, despite their ‘buddy’ status.” 

Not to mention,” his voice rose once more, “look at how the Federation is treating people like yourself. So a few sectors joined the Rebellion, and they happened to be majority Indian. I wouldn’t be surprised if most of them were mutts like you and me. How do Federation citizens respond? By completely tormenting innocent members. You want racism? Look within your own borders first.”

“…Windsor.” Pell spoke the single word breathlessly. Seinen’s face lit up in consternation.

“Now, no, Windsor was—”

“Windsor was a massacre!” She cried. “You went straight into a civilian sector and targeted their largest planet! There were barely any survivors by the time we got there.”

Seinen stood up. “If you were there then you _know_ I did _nothing_! That was not my faction involved in that mess, not my fleet, not my crew, not _me_.” He stepped closer to Pell, as if decreasing the distance would be more persuasive. He clenched his jaw.

“I might be in charge of my own fleet, but I do _not_ have command over every faction and soldier in the Rebellion. You simply don’t have a clear picture of the Rebellion because one doesn’t exist. We’re too diverse, but we’re all still fighting for the same cause. Some of us employ more…severe methods…and I don’t always agree with something just because it was done in the name of the Rebellion.”

“…Fine, you’re right,” Pell conceded, desperate to change the topic and quell the intensity building in her chest. “But what you _did_ do was send your men to find us in Solaris all those months back.”

“Well, what would you have me do? I was tasked with finding the data, and that’s where you and your misfit bunch ran off to hide.”

“Wouldn’t that be better for you though, if we had just stayed out of your way? We were just hiding. We weren’t trying to deliver the data then. You asked why we didn’t just give up. This is what I was trying to tell you. We could have, but you also made it difficult. Would you have believed me if we had surrendered right then?”

Seinen didn’t have anything to say to that. She was right.

In the face of Seinen’s silence, Pell pushed on, anger forcing the words out of her. “If you _were_ given the order to march on Windsor, would you have done it? Even if it conflicted with your views or you didn’t want to do it?”

Whiplash. He stared at Pell while he struggled to form a proper response.

“Would you have just followed their every order? And to think you call _me_ a ‘dog of the Federation’. You’d willingly follow an order you don’t agree with?” she repeated.

“I…I’d like to think I have _some_ agency in my matters, Engineer. I can’t just be forced to do anything.”

“Hm, so you totally _would_ do something you didn’t want to.”

“Now, I didn’t say that—”

“See, you’d do anything for your home and family. You’re just like me. Not to mention, your home is just as shitty.”

“… _What_.”

“…I mean, let’s not forget your brother.” Pell snorted for good measure. She dug her heels into the proverbial sand where she stood. “You sure you can call yourself high and mighty with someone like him so high ranking? So much for fighting for justice and equity with you and him at the helm.”

Seinen froze at the words and glared at her. “ _What_ about my brother, exactly?” His eyes drilled into her as his mood turned dark.

“What, like you weren’t part of it? You didn’t just let it happen? He slaughters soldiers without a second thought. And have you seen his face when he does? Either it doesn’t faze him at all, or he looks like he’s getting off on it!”

He wrenched the coat’s fabric, fighting to suppress his rage at her attack on his brother. The things she said about Elliot, whether they were true or not, didn’t outweigh the tribulations they had gone through together, nor the loyalty they felt towards each other. Memories and voices flashed through his mind, dragging him back in time: feeble cries of hunger pangs on a barren planet; a single gunshot; a military-issued death notification. Elliot had been there for it all. He had even gone, in a final desperate attempt to obtain the data, on the retrieval mission without a moment’s hesitation against the _Neriander_. Elliot had done so despite the carrier ship he was on having no solid defenses. There was so much she didn’t know that he couldn’t say.

 _Don’t do it. She’s baiting you_. _Keep your cool._ Still, he couldn’t help twisting at it, leaving the stiff fabric an unsightly mess.

Pell blinked at him, unrepentant and umbrageous. _See? There’s no point in us being friendly. Let’s keep being enemies._ Seinen felt he had something to prove to her, and she knew it.

“I would think killing comes with the territory of being a soldier. And doing so without a second thought just makes it easier, as sad as that may be for you to come to terms with, Ensign.”

Pell ignored him. “I mean, it’s not like he had any better role models or a family to look up to.”

Seinen’s fist was in a death grip. Flashes of faces belonging to people long since gone went through his head. His footsteps were drawn to her.

“That’s enough. You truly don’t understand anything.”

Pell looked up at him with an impassive yet indignant expression. Expressionless, yet somehow still revealing everything she felt.

“Do you?”

Oh, he understood everything all right. Seinen stopped a few paces short of her before collecting himself, inhaling and then taking a step back. Though he was reluctant to have any emotion take hold of him, he allowed himself to feel a pang of anger. How dare she insinuate what she did? He pulled something from his pocket: a sealed test tube. In it was a thin glass divider separating two liquids.

Pell’s eyes narrowed at the sight of the vial, but she kept her jaw rigid and shut.

It wasn’t the best idea, the rational voice in his brain admitted, to squander more gas and increase her tolerance. But his blood was boiling at her words, and he was weary of their fighting.

Pell’s face remained unchanging. “That’s all you wanted to say to me? Go right ahead then.”

 _No, I wanted to say more. I wanted things to go smoother,_ he thought _. I wanted to spend more time with you and have a normal conversation. But all we seem to do is argue._

Instead of saying any of his innermost thoughts out loud, he clicked his tongue. “This conversation is over,” was all he said before tossing the tube in front of her. Shattering with a small _klink_ , the yellow gas fumes slowly enveloped her, too heavy to spread far, and Pell sputtered as taking a clean breath of air became difficult. Seinen saw her slowly nod off, head drooping down.

The gasses dissipated not long after. Seinen knelt on one knee and stared intently at her sleeping form.

“It’s a war, you know. It’s time to step up, or it’s time to back down.” He tested for a response. There was none. Her breathing was deep, slow, and gentle. He leaned in and whispered into her ear, “And there’s only one answer for me, Engineer.” He stared at her longer. _No change even after that?_ She was still. Maybe _too_ still. _Her shoulders aren’t relaxed enough._

Even after all this time, despite having absolutely no power, she was taunting him. She was always able to do that somehow. Whether it was with her eyes open, her face jeering at him over comms, or with her eyes closed, like she was doing now in person. It didn’t matter what she was actually saying or doing. He could read between the lines. Her eyes always shone. She gave him smug grins that almost said, _“You want me but can’t have me.”_ This took on a whole new meaning when she had become the very data he had been seeking. Right now, even with her eyes closed and “sleeping,” he felt it emanating off of her.

Was she really just his next target or the “data” to him anymore? His need for the data conflated with his desire for her.

His feelings and the situation at hand had tangled up. He really couldn’t tell the difference anymore. He was trapped in the helm that was his mind. Comm screens were poised at all angles around him. At first, they displayed the Rebellion’s insignia: the proud hawk. Then, static covered them all. No matter where he turned, he could only see the Federation’s emblem. That infernal symbol: the blue circle with its orange rim; a black arrowhead in the center speckled with stars; a pearly white north star to its right. He was made to stare at it for much longer than he would have liked. And then, when he thought he had had enough, all the screens showed _her_. She looked down at him, grinning, her playful twinkle in her eye challenging and teasing him at the same time. Truly, she was just as multifaceted as her home’s insignia. She and her charms were inescapable.

Her well-kept appearance, her glimmering eyes, her beautiful smile…His eyes had been on her more often than not when they were in the same place, he reflected. And maybe—just maybe—at times what he had really wanted was not to just spar with her as the intellectuals they were, but to also have her slender arms and legs wrapped around him.

To physically want someone, much less a lowly ensign, much less a _Federation_ ensign, had once set off a convulsion of animosity in his stomach.

What was worse was, at one time, he wasn’t sure if the revulsion abated or was augmented the more he interacted with her. But he had gotten used to it as time passed. And a day came when he registered, in horror, that it wasn’t animosity he was feeling in the pits of his abdomen any longer.

The coup de grace was that he now realized she was feeling the same way too. Probably had been for a long time. At what point her strategy during their back and forth first started to include hints of flirtation, he wasn’t sure, but how she had been acting on his ship since she arrived told him it didn’t matter. Would a normal enemy talk to him so playfully, look at him like that, be so lost in thought so as to walk into him? Does a normal enemy feel secure enough to continuously taunt their opponent even when they were stuck as a prisoner? He could rationalize each on their own, but not combined. No, he acknowledged to himself, this wasn’t normal. None of this was.

In light of this realization, her goading and abrasive attitude took on new meaning. She knew she was playing with fire and was attempting to go back to the status quo.

But now? What was he supposed to do right this very minute? He shifted his weight back.

His mission was done. He had already obtained the data, and it was getting decrypted. Later, he would help assist in the battle for the capital. He had nothing else to do. He could ask someone to look after her. After all, Elliot did tell him to alert him if she became a problem. Or he could just leave her to her acting.

…Or?

He yanked her face to his.

“Mmpf!” Seinen could hear her surprise at his sudden movement. His lips didn’t give her a chance to gasp for air. He held their chests together. In the heat of the moment, instinct took over and she tried to wrangle her arms to the front of her torso before fully realizing what was happening. In response, he separated briefly, taking note of her wide eyes. When his mouth joined hers again, he was insistent. He pressed his mouth into hers, trying to give his tongue access.

 _What are you doing?!_ Pell wanted to ask him, but instead sighed and let out a small groan into the kiss, a replacement for words she didn’t say. _What am_ I _doing?!_

_Bad idea, this is a bad idea, very bad idea._

_Don’t kiss me, I’m Federation! Don’t you know what that means?! We can’t!_

The logical part of her mind was screeching at her. Her heart thudded painfully against her ribs at his recklessness. She wanted to throw caution out of orbit, but fought to resist.

Then his tongue swiped across her own, and with a shiver, her mind went temporarily blank.

Successful, he took advantage of the moment, tongue entering her soft mouth, deepening the kiss. He explored her, pushing her down in the process.

“So, you were awake after all.” He pulled back and propped himself up on his hands, the moment snapping as he frowned at her. The light from the window sparkled in Seinen’s eyes. Pell, still reeling from what had happened, just gaped at him with her mouth half open. Seinen took note of her chest, how quickly it rose and fell. He’d done that. He’d finally left her breathless. He took some satisfaction in that. “You thought you could pass it off as actually being asleep? I know my handiwork, Engineer. I know what it can and can’t do to others. I just thought I’d show you how you should breathe.”

Pell’s breath began to steady as she adjusted herself so that the handcuffs didn’t pierce her back too hard.

“And how’s that?”

His gaze didn’t leave hers.

“Rough. Gasping for air before falling asleep.”

“…Are we still talking about the chemical?”

Seinen flashed a sinful grin.

“ _Maybe_. _Maybe_ not.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now, ladies and gentlemen, this is where the fun begins! I'm excited for the next chapter. Well, I guess I'm always and will always be excited (with a dash of panic of course), but especially so because chapters 4 and 5 are some of my favorites. They were chapters that passed numerous rounds of editing with basically nothing changing, barring rewordings.
> 
> Also: The Federation logo is stupid complicated. Look it up if you don't know what it looks like. The Rebel logo is so much cleaner. Maybe THAT'S why the Federation is losing, lol. Get it together, guys.
> 
> I was curious and wanted to hear y'all's (??) opinions on some stuff (choose to answer as little or as much as you want, I'd love to hear about all of them, though):
> 
> 1\. What did you think of the water/soup scene? Chronologically speaking, it was one of the last major edits done to chapter 3. I quite liked them a lot, but I did struggle a little trying to make them soft and sensual scenes.
> 
> 2\. Do you think the Federation and Rebels have memes? Obviously, they're not sharing with each other, but memes within their troops/batallions/etc? I mean, yeah, the Federation's communication systems are fucked, so there wouldn't be any long distance/internet memeing, probably :[
> 
> 3\. Knowing what you do now, would you say Elliot is a cockblock or a wingman (albeit unwittingly)?
> 
> 4\. What was your opinion on the ending (given how the story was going)? I quite liked writing it, and fun fact, it was the very first scene I wrote of this entire story (obviously a much more unpolished version). I was writing an FTL oneshot and the idea was a branching-off point in a scene written there, essentially. Brain was like "But what if they were HORNY?" and the rest was history. However, I am aware that it's not everyone's cup of tea, which is fair! Hopefully I pulled it off nicely.
> 
> 5\. How have you been feeling about the POV switches? I REALLY think this story needed both POVs and integrated them the way I did. It wouldn't have been enough to have one scene be just with one person. Plus, I thought it suited their dynamic. When you're in one head, you're not in the other. You don't know what they're thinking, and neither does the character. It's a mirror of the constant battles they have been playing with each other.  
>    
> **Warning:** A potentially dubious consent kiss (up to interpretation, is not clear cut; I've heard it described from all 3 points of the spectrum from different people) after a failed gassing attempt was done (despite knowing it would probably fail). This scene is as dubious as it gets and is the only one in the fic.  
> 


	4. The Assent (Ascent)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing to see here. Just enemies doing enemy things to each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Special thanks to my betas Ghosteh, Karios, Created, Urisarung, Charlye, Space Aqueerius, and RillaOfIngleside

Seinen leaned in close. Pell instinctively snapped her legs shut. Not that he was focused on that; he seemed to be looking for something in her eyes.

“Would you like to?” His smiling face hovered over hers, eyes half-lidded in an amorous stare. Pell’s face began to burn everywhere his breath touched. Seinen wasn’t close enough to kiss, but she could still feel his mouth and every inch he brushed past. Circling her left cheek, his breath trailed down her neck, sending goosebumps rippling through her as she clenched her eyes shut, fighting to stifle a gasp. Seinen paused as a small whimper still escaped her lips, and he ducked in, pressing his lips to cool skin.

“W-What are you doing?” Pell uttered, voice barely above a whisper.

It took him a moment to respond. He let his lips linger on her pulse, as if reveling in the speed of her heartbeat. “Hm?” His voice suave and hushed like warm, smooth silk caressing across her skin. He rested his face in the crook of her neck before raising it to brush his cheek against hers. Pell’s breath hitched. As their eyes met, she felt heat course through her body, concentrating in her face and hands, a stark contrast to the chill of the floor. 

Seinen sweeped a finger along her shoulder. “I’ve seen the way you look at me. I know you’re attracted to me. And I think you’re stunning. So…why not enjoy ourselves before everything ends? We have the time.”

“…You think I’m beautiful?” She swallowed hard, forcing steadiness she didn’t feel into her tone.

In one fluid motion, he sat back up, pulling her with him and burying a hand in her hair. He undid her bun, snapping his wrist to send the hair tie flying. “Particularly so with your hair down.” 

He combed fingers through her straight hair, encouraging it to cascade past her shoulders.

Seinen ran a finger down the crimps in her hair from where she always tied it up. Pell fluttered at his touch, eyes darting frantically between his face and wandering hand. Seinen’s gaze burned through her as he perused her whole body, his expression unreadable. He didn’t give her time to wonder at the thoughts hidden behind that mask as he dragged her in closer with a firm hand on her lower back. His hand slid from her hair to her chin, and he tilted her face up as he leaned closer.

“Do you want me to say it again?” Lips brushed against her cheek as he whispered into her left ear. “You’re _stunning_.”

All the tension drained from her body, his words music in her ears. She closed her eyes and lifted her head, wanting to only revel in the warmth spreading through her body at his declaration. A soft and steady moan passed her lips again, but this time she didn’t try to stop it. Seinen brushed her cheek with his in response.

Encouraged, he returned his attention to her neck, murmuring compliments into her now flushed skin as Pell’s head fell back, granting him further access to her sensitive skin. Still in a daze, she turned her head, attempting to capture his mouth in another fierce kiss, only to find his once soft grip now a steel vice, locking her in place an unsatisfactory distance from his mouth. One arm curved up across her back and held her left shoulder, preventing her from meeting his mouth. Pell almost hadn’t noticed it in her trance. It was only when she tried to meet him did he use force.

Seinen clicked his tongue softly. “I don’t think so. It’s your turn now.”

“…My what?” Without the distraction of his lips on hers, her senses began to clear.

“I said you’re beautiful. Now, what am I? I know you’re thinking it. Say it out loud.”

Pell huffed. “An asshole. If you’re so sure, why ask?”

“Is it a crime for a man to want a compliment from the woman he’s fond of? Besides, things will be easier for us if you just admit it, Abernathy.” He nipped at her neck. “Say it.”

She felt her face flush. “…‘Fond of’?”

“Yes. Have I not made that clear?” He seemed close to exasperation.

“You certainly had a weird way of showing it.”

Maintaining his hold on her, he leaned forward and explored her neck with his lips. “Then, if you are not convinced, all you have to do is say what I want to hear. Tell me. Do it, and I’ll give you more proof. I will make it crystal clear.” His words were sharp and enunciated, emphasized with small nips as he worked his way down to her collarbone. 

Pell hesitated. Her face burned with embarrassment. To have anyone, much less this man in particular, nibble at her neck, overwhelmed and distracted her from responding. Delight washed over her. Anticipation filled her mind at what exactly he meant by that. “But—”

“ _Tell me_.”

She sighed. “Mind control has long worn off, you realize that? I don’t have to tell you shit. But, if you insist…I _guess_ …” She let out a groan of frustration, struggling to form a coherent thought with those damn lips still tracing along her skin. _Oh, when I get out of these handcuffs, I will make you_ pay _._ Though she would have much rather said her thoughts out loud, she couldn’t deny what he was saying.

But while her mind clung to denial, her body had long thrown caution to the wind. It craved his touch, demanded it. But Pell was beginning to become entranced, and Seinen wouldn’t give her what she desired unless she played along.

Seinen lightly tugged on her hair, granting him access to more of her neck. Each sensation burned and was unyielding to which Pell gave a sharp exhale. “Just a guess, Abernathy? No, that won’t do. You’re going to have to say something with a little more _dedication_ than that.”

“Fine! You’re a _jerk_.” The response was automatic, even as fire burned around her.

Seinen sighed before giving a chuckle. He continued mapping out Pell’s neck. “Hmmm, there’s the passion I was looking for. Unfortunately, not the correct answer. Try again.” 

“I think…Nnnn…I want…Hngh, fine!” she exclaimed, his mouth finally frustrating her. “I’ll say it. But it doesn’t mean anything if you force it!”

Seinen, still holding her, pulled back to examine her face. His eyes glinted. Despite pupils blown wide with desire, he looked nothing short of serious with how the light framed him. “That’s right.”

Pell waited to hear the rest for some sort of sly remark, but he just continued staring at her.

She wasn’t expecting his eyes to twinkle as he slowly released her. Instead of a sly remark, he wore a paltry smile. He held his hands up, eyes briefly closed in mock defeat before he met her gaze again. 

A staring contest ensued.

A groan of annoyance grew in Pell’s throat, but she remained stubbornly silent.

Seinen gave her a once-over. The same smile plastered on his face. “For what it’s worth, I really do find you beautiful.” He caused the burn yet tried to soothe it at the same time.

She blinked. “Why?”

“‘Why’, you ask? Would you like me to wax poetic? Would you like me to talk about your hair, your eyes, the way you talk, the way you think?”

 _…Did he say “the way I think?”_ she thought to herself in disbelief. “How often have you thought about all this?” _About…me?_

“Well, if you’re curious enough, I’ll let you know what I think after I hear what I want first.”

 _…Here I go_. There was no escaping it. She had to give in—but only just this one time—she told herself. “…I think you’re attractive,” she barely whispered.

Seinen’s grin grew a tad wider. Eyes narrowed. “I didn’t quite catch that.”

If Pell could, she would have gone completely red at this point. Heat rushed to her cheeks as she found herself unable to resist rising to the challenge in his voice. “I _said_ ,” she repeated, her voice increasing, “I think you’re…handsome!” Nerves finally tripped her before her brain caught up. _Shit._

“Ah, that’s what I wanted to hear.” Seinen immediately wrapped strong, lithe arms around her, pulling them chest to chest. Warm hand in her hair, he tipped up Pell’s face to his. A thumb caressed her cheek.

His mouth was almost to hers, hot breaths mingling in the narrow space between them. 

_“What a good soldier.”_ He smirked, his voice low and sultry.

Heat washed over her at the remark. She only briefly tried to interpret the emotion—was it bashfulness or nervousness or rage—before giving up, feeling soothed and protected so close in his embrace. This time, Pell freely opened her mouth to him, and their tongues intermingled.

When they finally came up for air, their glazed eyes locked before Seinen returned to his exploration of her skin, tugging her uniform to expose new tantalizing areas as she moaned, head heavy against his shoulder as she went limp. She could feel warmth emanating from his face as he brushed along her.

“So, I was right,” he panted. Pell didn’t know how he could sound so smug when out of breath.

“Your face is hot.” She dodged the statement. “You’re embarrassed.”

“Ha.”

Pell smiled mischievously, ignoring the pleasant goosebumps that were spreading across her shoulders and neck. “Do you want me to say it again? I think you’re handsome.”

She swore she could feel more heat radiate from his face as the moments passed. His head bent and resting on her shoulder, she leaned in to whisper, “You _are_ charming.” His hands tightened on her waist; she could sense his almost instinctive desire to pull her ever closer. She encouraged him by murmuring in his ear, “Is that enough for you, or should I keep going?”

“God, _yes_.” Seinen’s voice was tight, overwhelmed with the sensation of finally, _finally_ getting her here, alone with him. He reached up to Pell, deepening the kiss with ferocity, closing his eyes and letting Pell sink backwards.

Seinen rested on his forearms, one hand still buried in her soft hair as their bodies moved against each other as if they hoped they could grind down the other to nothing in the heat of the moment. The attraction that had slowly built through their game had finally reached a boiling point, searing through each other as they kissed like the fate of the war depended upon it, surfacing for air only briefly before being drawn back in to each other. The thrill of the moment pushed them perpetually onwards.

Pell could ignore the sensation of her handcuffs piercing her back. But annoyance sprung up when there was no way to pull him closer. He was on top of her, but she couldn’t feel any of his weight.

“Closer,” she almost rasped in demand. She wrapped her legs around his waist, causing him to groan as he wrapped his arms around her and rolled onto his back. Pell straddled him as his hands trailed up her back and underneath her handcuffs. One hand rested on the small of her back, the other slid to her neck and dragged her down towards him.

“Better?” His eyebrows raised in earnest.

Pell responded with a deep kiss. Seinen reacted in kind, pulling her into him further.

As they moved together, she felt a stab into the right side of her breast. She tried pulling away, only to realize her uniform had been caught onto something. Peeved by a sensation that failed to leave her nerves twisting and turning in elation, she opened an eye to see his hawk emblem glittering ominously at her. The sight of it snapped her out of her reverie. The time for gratification was over. Reality slammed back down around her.

She reared back, abruptly ending the kiss. “This is insane. You always sleep with someone before you kill them?” 

Seinen’s eyes, still very much glazed, blinked at her in confusion. “…Huh?” A moment, and then, “Who said I was going to kill you?”

“Bullshit, what other outcome is there for the _literal Federation data_ in Rebel hands at the end of a war?!”

“First of all, you’re not _just_ data, even if I _did_ call you ‘Little Miss Data’. Second of all, that doesn’t mean I’d kill you.” He stroked the back of her neck, attempting to pull her back down. When she resisted, he gave an easy smile but it did little to reassure her. “I knew full well that I wouldn’t be the cause of your death. I’m almost certain it would be because you tried to do something heroic.” He pulled their faces closer again, his voice a low rumble. “But, if you behave, and stay in this room, where I can protect you, things will be fine.” He dragged her back in for another kiss, eyes sliding shut.

“Not if the flagship explodes,” she said milliseconds before their lips met, breaking Seinen from the moment.

He sighed, eyes rolling. “And here we go again. But we were having _so_ much fun just right now. Do you really want to discuss this again? Your crew can’t even enter the sector as they are right now. But you? I can at least save you.”

“…What? What’s the point in saving just me without my whole crew?”

“That’s—” _I couldn’t find a way to justify capturing them too this late. It would have been dangerous for Elliot to engage your whole ship. Maybe if our chase hadn’t gone on for as long as it did. But would I have even noticed you if it didn’t?_

“I’m only as good as the rest of my crew.”

“I disagree, but perhaps we should table this discussion for another time?” His voice barely raised above a whisper as he ran her hair between his fingers. “I think you’re just fine on your own.”

Pell exhaled through her nostrils as she struggled to break free and sit up on him. Seinen frowned, looking even more displeased as the space between them increased.

“Don’t you have a job to do?” she snapped. “Aren’t people going to wonder what you’re doing, stuck in a room with a woman? They’re not going to wonder where their asshole leader is?”

He laughed, hands sliding distractingly down her thighs. “That’s the thing about being a captain. There’s always someone to delegate your job to. My fleet is supposed to handle the sorry remains of your precious Federation. So no, they won’t miss me for an hour.”

“An hour? Well, aren’t _we_ being optimistic?”

His eyebrow twitched.

“We’ll see about that.” He hooked his arm under her knees and held tight around her back. He lifted her off into his arms, to which she gave a small objection. Pell leaned into his chest, ignoring the jab of his emblem pin. There was something oddly entrancing about his warmth, and she sank willingly into it as he carried her towards his bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> E/N: Are things getting steamy around here? hehe
> 
> Did you enjoy the back and forth between the two? It's a little different than arguing, but I guess it's still very much the same. Just a different kind of passion xD I wanted it to be romantic enough but still showcase the enmity.
> 
> My absolute favorite part was the "What a good soldier." line. Did you like that too? >:3
> 
> This chapter was fun to write but I'll be honest looking back I have no recollection of where these ideas came from. Usually I can very clearly remember how something originated, but not here. Not for most of the spicy parts of the story, anyway. I dissociated and wrote smut leadup, essentially. What was I thinking? While editing the chapter I would also keep going "I can't believe I wrote this, I can't believe I wrote this, I can't believe-" AHHHH
> 
> See you this Thursday with Chapter 5!  
> 


	5. Rogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Rebels are trash, and I'm a raccoon." - An autobiography by Pell Abernathy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Here's a treat! 6 will post as normally next Monday.
> 
> Special thanks to my betas Ghosteh, Karios, Created, Urisarung, Space Aqueerius, Charlye, and RillaOfIngleside

He laid her down on the firm mattress meant for one. Even as Pell shuffled in nervousness, the mattress absorbed all sound. She looked towards Seinen as he turned to push a button on the control panel next to the door. For a brief moment the panel lit up with a blue “Sound Encryption: ON” in small print before dimming.

Before Seinen could join her on the bed, she shot him a glare, freezing him in his tracks.

“What is it? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Before we do _anything_ , you have to take _these_ off.” She twisted her shoulders, arms still pinned behind her.

Seinen chuckled as he sat down at the edge beside her knees. _That’s all?_ He placed one of his feet on the edge of the mattress and rested his elbow on his knee. He propped his chin in his hand. “Fine. Go ahead. I think you can handle that on your own.”

Pell’s face filled with consternation. “…What?” Her eyebrows furrowed, and Seinen’s chuckle turned to a full laugh. _She’s a good actress for an engineer, I’ll give her that._

“I said fine. Do it yourself.”

“How am I going to do that? I’m not the one with the override!”

“You’re not,” Seinen said matter-of-factly, “But you _do_ have a laser with you. Disguised as one of the buttons in your sleeves, correct? Use it.”

Pell’s glare was now ice-cold, Seinen returned it with his own fiery grin.

“ _If_ I had something like that,” she spat out, “then why didn’t you confiscate it?”

“You’d feel a lot more at ease if you still had your toy. Besides, it’s not like it would have helped you much. You’re free to try and do what you want, but just realize it would have probably gotten you killed.”

She scoffed and looked away. “You’re _definitely_ insane! If I had a laser, I could still harm your crew.”

“Hm, no, don’t think so. You wouldn’t go for my crew. Maybe you’d disarm one, but only knock him out. No, you’d go straight to _me_.” He slid against the wall before laying on his side facing her, propping his head in his hand and grinning lazily at her. “Ambitious, aren’t we? I’m so flattered to be the target of your affections.” He drew circles on her cheek with his free hand. Pell looked like she was about to bite his finger clean off. “But that itty-bitty thing hardly scares me, Abernathy.”

She scowled in response. “…You were just planning to remove it while I was asleep, weren’t you?”

“That’s a moot point, you weren’t asleep,” he retorted. “Besides, you came here while unconscious, and yet, you still have it.”

Pell continued glaring at his visage as she heaved herself upright, struggling to get her fingers into her sleeves. Seinen’s eyes glimmered up at her, the grin spreading ever wider across his face as he heard the button detaching. She craned her neck so she could position the laser just right. As the laser sizzled against the handcuffs, Pell didn’t break eye contact with Seinen, whose gaze reeked of pure satisfaction.

“That’s quite enough,” she snapped. Practically every look he had been giving her was self-satisfactory and haughty, and it was infuriating. Though the room was only dimly illuminated from the blue light of the nearby portviews, it was all too easy for Pell to tell what Seinen was thinking.

The glint in his eyes dimmed. “Fine,” he said, trying to look more composed, though the corners of his mouth still were upturned.

 _Keeping a straight face is clearly more difficult for him than toppling the Federation_ , she thought.

The broken metal bracelets fell off with a heavy clink as Pell carefully angled the laser, making sure not to take a chunk of herself with it. Her shoulders, arms, and hands all loosened as relief flooded through her at being able to finally have a range of motion again. She shook out her hands, working feeling back into her fingertips.

“Now.” Seinen sat up and slid his arms around Pell, his hands past her so that it felt like his chest and arms enveloped her. “Where were we?”

A warm, distracting static began to fill Pell’s mind as he pulled her close, battling the irritation she felt at his boldness. Through the growing haziness she heard him brush the debris off the bed. Her heart pounded so loud in her ears, she barely heard the sound of metal hitting the floor, despite the less-than gentle cacophony they made on impact. Her initial reaction was to lean back, but she almost slid down the bed’s edge with Seinen advancing closer. The irritation that had briefly flashed in her mind began to bubble upwards. Her stomach flipped at the anticipation of their intimacy. Her annoyance was set off by his cavalier attitude, his lips getting ever closer, already certain in his victory. His breath tickled her whole face. She couldn’t see him, just the blackness of the room. She acted on instinct.

_CRACK._

Her open palm connected squarely with his right cheek.

Seinen held the spot she slapped, his hair disheveled from the sudden whiplash.

“That was for earlier.” Pell’s flustered attitude dissipated as the irritation left her.

Seinen’s glare darkened to something unreadable as he leveled with her. _Contempt perhaps?_ No sooner had the emotions come across his face did they disappear.

“What?” Her voice was a light and airy drawl. “It’s only fair.”

Pell swayed her head back and forth, pretending to contemplate. “Actually, I could have done worse. I could have done this,” she said as she shoved him backwards. _Huh, that was easier than I was expecting._ He didn’t even flinch as she straddled him, a dreamy smirk plastered all over his face, illuminated by blue and white lights outside.

Pell leaned forward so their noses were touching. Without breaking eye contact, she mirrored his expression, right hand trailing down his chest, exploring the hard muscles there as her left surreptitiously searched the bed.

Delighting in the sensation, he tipped his head back further and fought the urge to shut his eyes; the view in front of him was a sight to behold and he wasn’t going to miss it for the universe. One of the Federation’s final chances of survival, perhaps their last hope, straddling him with that look on her face? _Priceless. Who could resist?_

He slowly slid his hands up her legs and rested them on her thighs, thumbs circling and massaging the strong muscles that held him in place. _I fail to see how this is worse than a slap._

Her hand darted in and out of his suit jacket as he felt her lean on him. He gave a pleasant hum in response to the sensations, almost like a purr. Pell flicked her gaze down to his face at hearing the sound. Encouraged, she circled her hand back under his jacket. Seinen continued his honey-like purr, arching ever so slightly into the touch.

Her weight shifted as her hand closed around a small object. “Now—” She tugged at the edge of the collar, “—take these off.” Pell’s face became serious.

 _Oh? This is new. I quite like that look on your face._ “I’d be more than willing to, Abernathy, but I’m afraid that is not exactly possible given my current position.” He twined strands of hair around his fingers and gave a gentle tug, attempting to pull her into a kiss.

Pell responded with a quiet smile, almost victorious. “Well then, shall I help you?”

“Please do.”

“Good.” She brought the aforementioned laser up, pressing it to his neck. “Still not afraid of this?”

Seinen’s smile dissipated, jaw clenching. “What are you—” His fingers dug into her thighs, whimsy and lust turned into a death grip.

Pell closed the distance further, her hair falling down across his cheeks and onto his chin. She maintained eye contact as she gave a sinister grin, dancing the chilled casing of her laser across his neck, the pinpoint frost of the metal burning icey lines as it brushed along. The random motions sent shivers down Seinen’s spine as his breath hitched. Pell snickered at the sound. “Oh, is this turning you on? Maybe I should turn _this_ on?” She continued running it side to side on his throat; he felt the small but definitely cold sensation of fragile metal.

“Get _off_ , Engineer,” he hissed. He bucked his hips in an attempt to throw her off, but Pell grabbed his shoulder and ground down with her pelvis, pinning him in place. There was something in the way her eyes glinted at him, in how she kept leaning forward to kiss him before reeling back, that told him there was no need to do anything drastic. Seinen tried to throw her off once more, but the half-hearted attempt at defiance failed. He even tried to grab her, knowing full well she would pin his hands above his head.

“Hmm, maybe I _will_. But why so serious now?” She lightly gyrated against him as she spoke. He clenched his teeth and fists while flashing a tempestuous glare. Her voice was velvety as the laser continued to trace lines across his skin. “You were the one telling me earlier how this didn’t scare you. You think I’d end up dying of my own accord? Well, I think you’ll end up dying when the Federation obliterates this ship. I’m here as a prisoner, yes, but don’t think for a second that handcuffs are the only thing I can cut. _Especially_ now that my hands are freed. So, _behave_.” Pell kissed him under his chin, warm lips a stark contrast to the laser’s chill metal. Seinen’s sharp uptake of breath expelled out as a deep chuckle.

To be called out on his bluff like that with such a brazen attitude! Who else could do that to him? “I wouldn’t dream of anything else, my dear!” The smirk returned to his face as he tried to rise up, being met with more kisses on the neck as Pell shoved him back down.

“I just told you to _behave_. Did I tell you to get up?”

Tiring of feigning submission, he snaked a hand into her hair, tugging hard as he flipped her on the bed, reversing their positions. Using his weight to pin her, he slowly wormed his fingers into the hand that held the laser with a clenched fist, effortlessly liberating it from her. “No, but I would like to ask the same of you.”

Seinen held the small weapon within his enclosed fist above her. He clenched his fist, _crunch_ , feeling the small laser become countless smaller pieces. “We do not need any toys between us.” He rubbed his fingers against his palm above the floor, dusting off the remains.

Pell snickered. Seinen cocked an eyebrow at her. “What?” he asked. “Still think you can escape or cut me down? You don’t happen to have any more weaponized buttons, do you?”

“Well, you’re certainly free to check each one…” she drawled. “I’m surprised you don’t already know the answer. But…even if that was my last button, I’m very resourceful. I’m sure I’ll find a way. I always do.”

“Speaking of checking...” Seinen began to unbutton Pell’s uniform with his other hand. “I believe you were going to do something about my uniform?”

He had managed to work his way through three buttons before he allowed her to shove him backwards as she sat up. “Of course,” she said, pulling him into a searing kiss. Warm hands roamed his chest before hooking around the top button of his jacket. “Starting with this…”

She slid her hands into his jacket, relishing the heat she could feel radiating off him. He hummed pleasantly at the touch and leaned in to nip at her neck. Sliding her hands upwards, Pell detached the hawk emblem, pausing to examine it as it glinted in the light. Seinen turned his attention to the emblem as well as she appeared to be considering something.

And then spiked it across the room.

The sound of it cracking was very much audible.

Seinen frowned. “Hey,” he protested, his voice raised in warning.

“I just put it where it belongs,” she said dismissively. _On the ground, broken._ Her hands moved faster under his jacket, undoing the smaller military pins and tossing them to the floor.

“Hey, hey, _hey_!” Seinen grabbed her wrists and looked at her earnestly. He steadied her. “Maybe you should focus on removing the jacket as a whole, instead? With everything still attached?”

Sounding dejected, she sullenly dropped her hands from the remaining pins. “Fine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And you probably thought their dynamic couldn't have gotten more intense after the last chapter? Wrong.
> 
> Pell got some time to shine. There was a reason I tagged the story "Constant Power Dynamics Reversal" (which, yeah, you might not have had any idea what that meant clicking on the story, but you should now). It was a main reason why I hesitated marking the whole fic as dubcon and just opted for the one warning I'd need. There's a push and pull, ebb and flow, that continues besides the ongoing circumstances. Yeah, you show Seinen who's boss, Pell.
> 
> Again, have 0 recollection of how I came up with the ideas in this chapter. I just thought it wouldn't be fun to have those handcuffs on, but that doesn't mean it wouldn't be fun to take them off ;). And, of course, Seinen would make it difficult for Pell, as he always does, and things went on from there.
> 
> I'm curious how you reacted to Pell slapping Seinen as well as the laser scene. Really, I enjoyed every scene in this chapter in its own right and would love to hear what you thought (the handcuffs scene, slap, laser, emblem). The ending was also very funny but also had the right amount of symbolism (which wasn't really intentional, but worked VERY well).
> 
> Well, let's see what happens next week. Maybe they'll FINALLY undress (but will they have sex??) Or maybe Elliot shows up and boom, fic done. There's a world of possibilities.
> 
> Have a nice day!


	6. *That Which You Have Shown Me, Is Neither Silver Nor Gold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter has smut in it. A lot is going on during the sex, though, so it is highly recommended to NOT skip the smut. You will miss a lot if you do.
> 
> Special thanks to my betas Ghosteh, Karios, Created, Urisarung, Space Aqueerius, Charlye, and RillaOfIngleside

This time, Pell fixated on his big jacket buttons in earnest. Seinen stared at her with amusement as his jacket became unbuttoned at last. He had a teasing glint in his eyes. “Was that so hard?”

“Oh, it was unbearable.”

Seinen chuckled as he pressed his forehead to Pell’s and gave a relaxed shrug. “I’ll let it slide, just this once.” The jacket slid off as he spoke, and the corner of his lips quirked up in amusement as it did. Without ceremony or care, he crumpled it into a ball and tossed it to his chair.

His crisp white dress shirt stood out, bright in the dark room, reflecting the cool blues of the light that slid across the walls. The light shifted as he leaned forward and resumed unbuttoning Pell’s jacket, eyes never leaving her as she leaned back on her hands to let him work the clasps apart.

Seinen delicately slipped the jacket off her shoulders. He ran work-roughened fingers across every inch of her exposed skin. Pell shivered at the touch, burying her face into the crook of his neck as her fingers glided to his shirt. Seinen felt warm lips press against his skin in distracting contrast to the cool air; it sent goosebumps across his chest. Her mouth traced along his neck with excruciating patience. He tilted his head, granting her more access as nimble fingers dropped warmth upon him only to move to the next spot, leaving an ache for that ardor to return.

As she made quick work of the remaining buttons, Seinen’s hands traced lines up her body from hips to chest. He gave an insistent nudge to her shoulder that had her willingly lift her arms as his hands returned to the hem of her shirt. Pell’s eyes squeezed shut in anticipation. In one smooth motion, Seinen removed it, leaving some of her hair mussed from static.

“Finally,” Seinen breathed. He loosened his tie and tossed it aside. Taking advantage of the moment, Pell dragged the shirt from his shoulders, the crisp fabric drifting abandoned to the floor.

His hands ventured to the square-like, strapless bra she wore—one of the standard issue options for all military women, it appeared, not just Federation.

He had seen a woman wear one this close before. Her image appeared in his mind’s eye: long, curly black hair and a somber frown directed at him. He promptly squashed that image down, leaning into the distracting taste of Pell’s lips.

_No, it won’t be the same. She was different. It’s different this time._

Seinen pulled his undershirt off to cover his eyes in hopes it would cover up his thoughts. His sight went dark, but his mind was still alight with past memories.

Huffing, he threw the garment to the ground and crawled forward. Pell was forced to inch backwards in response to his aggression until her spine hit the wall. Seinen sat back on his knees and dragged her into his lap, chest to chest with her legs wrapping around his waist. He pulled her in for another kiss, his teeth grazing her bottom lip as he devoured the small whimper it dragged from her.

Glazed eyes locked. Fire and ice clashed. Months of unacknowledged tension and unspoken attraction finally culminated in this single finite moment. It was as dangerous as it was intoxicating.

_I’m not going to die. I can feel it in my bones._

Hands took their time in tracing back muscles, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

_It’s you I’m worried about._

Nails drifted up spines and burned lines into sensitive skin.

_…But, if there’s a chance you’ll die, and if there’s a chance I’ll die, then I might as well enjoy this right now, right? The only other witness I have is you._

Seinen’s hand snuck upwards, joining the other to unclasp her bra. She almost looked away out of nervousness. But out of the corner of her eye, she saw that his own eyes were clouded with desire, mouth parted. He was in no condition to judge her. So, she locked eyes with him as her bra tumbled down, exposing her bare chest. This time, she was the one to sweep it to the ground.

She became painfully aware of how their pants were still on when she wrapped herself around him tighter and pulled him in for another kiss. She deepened the kiss, bodies tight, evidence of his arousal pressing hard into her pelvis.

Anticipation tingled up from low in her stomach to her ribs. It wasn’t the bad kind, though she had no idea what to expect. She had been so swept up with emotion and so focused on dying that she had forgotten one critical detail:

_Is having my first time with this man a good idea?_

She wanted him, but that didn’t stop the tight knot of anxiety from forming in her stomach. _What about him? Has he done it before?_ Would revealing her lack of experience cause its own set of issues? She could already hear the teasing. Who knows what he would be like if she truly let down her guard. Would he be gentler if she told him? Her cheeks flushed, conflicted on how to proceed.

“…Abernathy?” Seinen’s breath huffed in reminder, bringing her back to the present.

“Lay down.” He breathed out the words as they parted from their embrace.

Pell struggled to come up with something to say as she laid back, but she couldn’t find the words. As she stretched out on the bed he drew a finger up along her shin to her inner thigh, sending a shiver through her despite the cloth barrier between them. His fingers paused near the waistband of her pants, lightly brushing the exposed skin above. He gave her a contemplative look.

She didn’t need further prompting. She hooked her pants with her thumbs, arching her back so she could remove them as far as she could. Seinen took care of the rest, and soon the pants were also on the floor. The underwear joined them shortly after. She felt hot all over, exposed. She tried to be nonchalant with how she wrapped her arms around herself.

Seinen raised himself up on his knees, pushing his pants and underwear down. Pell almost wanted to look away, but curiosity stopped her.

Through the dim light and shadows, she could clearly make out his erect cock.

Her thighs clenched in anticipation, warmth pooling in her lower half. _Surely he’s not just going to… put it in?_ She wanted him but her heart was racing at how fast everything was going. _Too fast!_ her mind shouted, even as her body urged, _not fast enough_.

When Seinen tenderly pulled apart her knees, she gripped at the sheets, tamping down the quick flare of panic. Seinen noted the movement but remained silent as he leaned in closer. Pell couldn’t stop staring at how close his erection was to her.

“How well can you see me?” Pell asked as his gaze burned holes into her. It was taking all she had not to stammer out that question. She hadn’t thought her body could feel any more flushed, but she was wrong. Despite the cool air circulating through the room, she was starting to perspire from the heat.

The constantly shifting light of room granted him only tantalizing glimpses of her body beneath him. Slices of sky and ocean blue highlighted a hip bone here, then the curve of one breast there, followed by a single bare shoulder, before shadow swallowed it again. He had this rare, intimate opportunity to finally truly see her, and he didn’t appreciate being foiled in that attempt.

He already knew so much about her background, but that wasn’t enough. He wanted to know every inch of her, inside and out. He wanted to memorize the planes of her body, revel in the subtleties, the minutia. Not only that, he wanted to show her that side of himself. The things that made them each beautiful, the imperfections that made them who they were. He didn’t need to see to know they were there—he already knew just how imperfect both of them were—but in this moment he just wanted to lose himself in her beauty.

He shifted, hoping some more light would reach her. Not much luck. “Not very well.” He admitted, voice tinged in disappointment. _In more ways than one._ He would have liked to admire her, burn the image of her into his mind for eternity, but the darkness wouldn’t stop him; lips and hands would serve him just as well as he explored her. “And you?”

She didn’t like that his face was hidden in shadow, his expression a mystery to her. “Likewise.”

Seinen drew his hands along her shoulders, leading them down to her collarbone. He continued down to her breasts, circling them before cupping them in his hands, gently exploring them. He brushed his rough thumb along one of her sensitive nipples, evoking a sharp gasp.

Without another word, he moved down her body, lowering his lips to drag along burning skin, moving further and further south, pausing every now and then when he elicited a whimper from her. Something jumped in her chest. _Wait, okay, so you’ll do that first._

Pell felt his hot breath at her entrance and along the creases of her thighs. She tightened her grasp on the sheets as Seinen’s soft nose nudged along her before giving way to his tongue. Electricity shot up her body as his tongue, wet and cool, explored her skin, the rest of her body burning up with a kind of desperate longing she’d never felt before. Overwhelmed, her legs snapped tight against his shoulders from need. He didn’t react to this, keeping his barrage up, slowly painting his way over to her entrance. Small strokes edged closer and closer until he was working around her folds, so close and yet infuriatingly, frustratingly far away. Pell began to breathe heavy. Her nerves felt like they were being consumed.

_Keep your breath in line._

_Don’t be too loud. Don’t let him realize—_

Seinen dipped his tongue into her folds and Pell gasped, all concentration she had on keeping silent shattered. Tingles singed up and down her legs. Having struck a chord, he kissed her where he was. Pell could feel pressure start to build in her pelvis. What she wanted was his tongue _in_ her. To have someone else quench that wet need that she had felt before, in the privacy of her own cabin back on her ship. _Could he do it?_ Words no longer formed complete sentences in her head, the jumble of thoughts tumbling towards raw feeling instead. And what she was feeling now was an unexpected twinge of jealousy at the fact that he certainly seemed to know what he was doing. Why had she been hoping he would be as equally clueless as she?

What she wanted to do was grab fistfuls of his messy curly hair and yank him to her, demand he make her sing and not say a word about how badly she wanted relief that only he could bring. Now was not the time for teasing. She wanted his lips everywhere along her. Wanted him to whisper that it was just her, and only her. That his name would burn on her skin for days.

But instead, she lay there, her breathing rough and unsteady, the damp arousal between her legs increasing. Tension locked into her chest as her hands clawed uselessly at the sheets.

And then, Seinen began kissing her, mouth open, letting his tongue glide between the folds, inside and outside and back in again. Pell could feel herself getting wound tighter and tighter as he continued, giving her no time to recover as he switched between sucking and the firm pressure of his tongue. It was a divine sensation she struggled not to lose herself in.

Pell couldn’t take it. She wanted to cry out or moan. The tension in her chest was shooting down into her pelvis and between her thighs, building with no end in sight.

 _Relief! I need_ relief _!_ She could not shunt out her desires through verbal expressions or movements. To do so would be giving this man an advantage she would never hear the end of. She clenched her eyes shut, feeling her body spasm as she shuddered. The edge was still present. Her abdomen was tense. Each careen of his tongue sent her wanting more, and it only grew when it glided up to her clit. He dabbed insistently at it, as if communicating in morse code for her to let loose and enjoy.

His tongue continued stroking her. Pell let out one large moan, fists clenching the sheets as hard as they could and toes curling in, her legs like a vice against his shoulders.

He paused in his ministrations and she felt the pressure of tug and war that had been building within her begin to ease. She delicately opened her eyes and saw Seinen’s locks lifting from between her legs.

“…Are you nervous?”

She raised herself up on her forearms and peered at him. Light shone on her face, though she could only make out his eyes glinting at her curiously. “No.” She tried to reign in her breath. “W-why would you say that?”

“Well…It just kind of feels like you’re resisting.” He whispered. “If the blankets could break, they would have by now. And yet you’ve hardly made a sound.”

She dropped back down on the pillow, sighing as she dragged her hand across her face in exasperation before aggressively fixating on the ceiling above her. The last thing she wanted was to reveal her inexperience, but it seemed like she was close to doing that. “Some people are just like that. They don’t make many sounds.”

Pell could hear the air vents cycling as Seinen didn’t say a word. The silence was beginning to feel stifling when he finally sat up to look down at her, a calloused hand gently massaging her inner thigh. She jolted at the touch and his eyes narrowed as he stopped. She bit down on her tongue, trying to keep her expression as neutral as possible. She tried to quench her flushed state; it felt like his laser-like focus could simply see right through her.

“You seem to be quite reactive though. Is something wrong?” He slowly brushed his left hand along her thigh, getting closer and closer to her entrance before pulling away.

“No, how could it? You just haven’t made me come yet, that’s all,” Pell huffed.

His hand crept closer once more, thumb slowly brushing against her folds. She inhaled sharply in response. Her legs clenched unbidden. “Are you sure it’s just that?”

“Y-yes!”

“Have you done this before?” His gaze bore into her, intent on observing her reactions this time.

“Done what? O-oral?” She took another sharp inhale as he made gentle, long strokes along her. Electricity shot through her and she pushed back into the pillow, leaning her head back and closing her eyes before meeting his stare again, hoping to sell her words.

“Playing the fool isn’t going to help you here.” His thumb found her clit and rubbed it in circular motions. Her hips pressed upwards against his hands in want for even more attention. “I’m referring to _sex_. Is this your first time?”

“Why don’t you stop talking and find out?”

Pell might have been imagining it, but she could have sworn she saw his eyes widen, flashing in response to the challenge. The rubbing stopped as he appeared to be formulating a response. Pell felt a little grateful that he finally stopped to think. It gave her a temporary reprieve.

“…Fine,” he relented as he bent his head back down, “but don’t think you can escape answering that question. I don’t appreciate deflection.” This time, when his mouth met her entrance, he didn’t hold back. His hands took her calves and spread them further, his grip firm but not painful as he pushed her legs slightly back. Seinen let go of one leg to bring two slender fingers to his mouth, gaze fiercely locked on her the whole time. Prickling heat grew on her neck and cheeks. The hands that she had been fantasizing about earlier, he was going to use them the way she had been secretly wanting: on her.

Seinen noticed her stir, a devilish grin creeping onto his face as he removed his fingers from his mouth, making sure Pell saw him give them one final small lick at his fingertips.

Not wanting to give in, she maintained eye contact as Seinen took his time lowering his hand.

As they slid into her, her head dropped back, unable to focus on him. He eased his way in, her sensitive walls rubbing against him. A whimper escaped her as he dragged his fingers back out, her want turning into liquid heat. She couldn’t see that he was still smiling at her reaction, but she could hear rustling as he adjusted position, still slowly thrusting fingers inside of her.

Then, she felt his tongue.

He circled her clit in clockwise motions while he fucked her with his fingers. Both sensations combined were nearly overwhelming her.

“Ah…” Pell struggled to speak. Almost as if on purpose, every time her mouth uttered a sound, he would just so happen to push into her again. “What—” she managed to say before being cut off again.

She felt his mouth stop, lips smiling against her skin. “You said I wasn’t making you come, right?” His voice, though, smug, definitely betrayed a breathlessness of sincere intent.

“You—” She tried to talk back. Seinen didn’t want to hear another word. He pressed onwards, teasing her as a long moan erupted from her. Her hips unconsciously thrusted towards him.

No more words. He only wanted to hear her divine reactions. It was one thing to see her in pain or hear her cry in pain, and while he had been the one responsible for that in the past, this was a completely different matter. This was a sort of agony he—and not her other enemies—was privy to. A craving only he could satiate. That fact was almost as enjoyable as the noises she made as she started to let her guard down. There was no greater pleasure than the undoing of one’s enemy.

 _I can’t believe I’m doing this._ He was simply astounded. Never in a million years did he expect this moment to come. He had very little in life to be grateful for. This was one of those moments.

_Look at what I’m doing to you._

_Look at what I’m making you do._

_…She never did answer my question, though._ The possessive satisfaction he felt vaporized when this thought crept back up, now front and center in his mind. Irritation flashed at the edge of his mind, his fingers and tongue moving faster, demanding another response from her. Pell’s moans shifted to heavy, rapid breathing. She was getting wetter, and her muscles were starting to tense and grip around his fingers. He used more force, to which she and her insides reacted more to in a constant cycle. He could feel her muscles convulse, clenching harder around his fingers as they slid into her.

 _Have you done this before?_ He wanted to ask her again, but he knew she was about to come and didn’t want to break his pace.

Pell, still leaning on her forearms, finally had enough. Her arms collapsed. Relief was coming, but she hadn’t quite crossed the threshold. She couldn’t think words, only feelings. Feelings that spoke of vulnerability that she couldn’t escape. Feelings that spoke of “he’s going to see it, and you don’t even know exactly what’s going to happen.” But also feelings that urged her to let loose. She wasn’t in control, hadn’t been for a long time, but at this point with the surge of heat coursing through her, the way her chest ached and her legs twitched, she was fine with paying any price if it meant she could climax.

Pell rolled her head, trying to find comfort in any position as the feelings intensified. Her back arched and rolled against him. _Come on!_ She urged, grasping his hair as she felt herself start to spasm, moans escaping her throat becoming smaller as they were snuffed out completely. She clenched her eyes and rolled her head back.

And he brought her to supernova.

He had heard her sounds become silent as release swept over her with convulsions. He felt her body moving, loose and unbridled in the passion.

He pulled away, sitting up from his position between her legs to watch hungrily as her shuddering slowly ebbed away, blank eyes staring up at the ceiling. He had done that to her, the undeniable proof laying in front of him, her breath rough and quavering as the tail end of her orgasm washed through her. She, at last, had been his.

A couple of minutes passed before he couldn’t hear her any longer, shades of blue eclipsing and sliding across the room as she regained composure.

She sighed.

Seinen took it as his cue. He stretched out over her, nestling between her legs, cock flush against her as he leaned down and kissed her long and passionately. _So that’s what I taste like?_ She wrapped an arm around his neck, sighing more into the kiss before reaching for air. Letting go of his neck, she tried once more to see the man hovering over her. Her fingers grazed along his cheek and trailed down his neck to his collarbone, then to his chest, admiring the hard muscle.

“It’s healed completely,” she whispered as she brushed a finger from his upper left chest down to his abdomen. “I can barely tell where you were cut.”

“The benefits of a very good medbay,” he rumbled. He leaned on an arm as he cupped a cheek with his hand. Pell turned her face into his palm, nuzzling it.

“Although, you know, I’m not _that_ sorry about it.” Pell traced where she remembered the wound to have been. “I did what I had to. You scared the shit out of me when I first saw you, and then you wouldn’t let me go.”

“And I’m not letting you go now, either.” His voice was low as he slid an arm under Pell’s back and leaned in close, rolling with her to the side, burying his face into her shoulder.

_Her memory went back to the halls of a certain Zoltan Research Facility. She was sprinting, panting, slowly getting exhausted._

_He was walking after her. There was no need to rush and expend valuable energy. He could be patient. He was inevitable, the natural conclusion. No matter what route the Engineer took, they’d all lead to him in the end._

_Pell heard static in her ear. Then, a message from Brian: “Pell, status report?”_

_“HE WON’T LEAVE ME THE_ FUCK _ALONE!” She screamed._

_“We’ll send someone down as soon as we get rid of these boarders!” Xander shouted through the comm device._

_The crew had arrived at the facility in hopes of getting some information on a damaged stasis pod they had come across. It had taken too much searching on their part, however, and the Rebel fleet caught up. By the time they found the laboratory, they had to be quick about their business._

_They’d received a ping from the Zoltan inside. The researcher offered them a trade: the lab would fix the pod in exchange for their participation in a study. Pell was the only one who was both trained as a boarder and a researcher. Tach could handle the engines while she was away. Charlie had beamed down with her into the facility to watch her back._

_No sooner had Pell and Charlie stepped into the facility, than the Zoltan communicating with their ship yelled that they were being held hostage by Rebels. One Rebel ship in particular—Seinen’s ship—had been hiding behind the facility the entire time._

_Boarders appeared back on their ship, now ASB locked, and Charlie had to return to fight, leaving Pell to explore what turned out to be empty halls. She looked for data or anyone to help. Seinen and Elliot would be waiting to ambush them, she expected. But when she had finished going through data on a lone computer, she turned around to meet the gaze of a very shocked Seinen on the other side of the door._

_She had been trying to escape him ever since._

_“No running in the halls.” She heard him sneer as he spoke, harkening back to his previous days as a professor. He was not out of breath, voice composed and steady after his initial reaction of surprise. “This is a place of scientific research and experiments. It’s neither safe nor polite to run. I thought you of all people would understand that, Engineer.”_

_Pell didn’t understand why he was only walking at first, but it quickly became apparent. The entire facility had been booby-trapped, and he knew just how to set them all off._

_She heard his plasma knife come out with a_ shng _and slice something. The next thing she knew, her vision was completely blinded as she was tossed aside. When she had regained her bearings and her vision, she turned around to see her pursuer._

_He was only a few feet from her. He smirked._

_“I told you not to run.”_

Seinen brushed hair out of Pell’s face before kissing her. A hand drifted down along her side, causing Pell to shudder when he reached her hip. She slid her leg up to hook around his waist. He rubbed the spot as he looked at her in earnest. “Last call to change your mind?”

“Think it’s a little too late to ask that.”

“Yeah, I guess we are too late.” Wistfulness seeped into his tone, his words heavy with unspoken intent.

“Besides, what would you do about this?” She reached her hand down to his erection, taking note of his gasp as she held it loosely.

“I… I…” He had another snark comment in mind, but her hand went further south as she took hold of his balls, massaging them. Pleasure started seeping into him. This was not how he expected Pell to help him feel good. “I could just get off, and you could watch?” He pushed her hand away, lifting himself back up and pushing her onto her back once more.

“That should be considered harassment.” Pell giggled. “I’ll ping for Elliot while you do.” Her arms bent and hands reaching for his shoulders, she let Seinen adjust himself, sitting on his knees between her legs.

His gaze became serious for a moment. “Don’t even joke about that. He wouldn’t take care of you _nearly_ as good as I, if he found out.”

“Hmm, jealous are we?” she sneered.

Again, that flare of envy and curiosity bloomed within him. “You know that’s not what I meant. He wouldn’t be nearly as accommodating to you, now would he?”

“Perhaps. But I’m still waiting to see how good you can be.” She fanned the flames of his jealousy.

Seinen wiped the scowl off his face, wanting to savour the moment with a clear mind. _I…I really am about to do this._ He adjusted himself one last time and held his dick in hand, the tip in line with her slit. As it nudged her she shuddered. Her eyes slid shut momentarily in anticipation.

Outside the window, a passing satellite blinked red, shading the lovers. Pell’s eyes scanned Seinen’s. A moment’s hesitation before passing the point of no return.

_Ready?_

_Ready._

Seinen pushed himself in.

It was agonizingly slow, an intentionally-controlled movement that gave her time to adjust to the increased pressure. His eyes were focused on her, his gaze not sharp like before but gentle and accommodating. Pell was glad that she couldn’t fully see his expression. She found herself both grateful at his consideration and desperate for him to just _hurry_ _up_ , to have him completely fill her, finally. He was hot and smooth, and the more he slid in, the more her stomach bubbled with pleasant, delicious tension. His gaze was unbearable as the feeling grew inside of her.

He groaned lightly, as did Pell, both shutting their eyes in awe of the sensations. He rested his forehead on hers.

“Ah!” She tried to stifle a cry as she clenched her eyelids shut and grasped his forearms. She could feel herself getting wetter, allowing him to easily slide deeper. She tried to keep her breath steady, tried to play off how much he was affecting her, but it just ended up making her pant more. But what was surprising was that she thought it was supposed to hurt. She had heard that so much she thought it was fact. Not to mention, wasn’t he the bad guy? Who had tried to hurt her several times before?

When he had gone as far as he could, he felt electric shocks going up his spine and back, accentuated by the feeling of the soft skin of her thighs in contact with his hips. Tight heat enveloped him. She was hot and wet, and the feeling of just sliding into her was already enough to get him panting. He saw her once again trying too hard to pretend she wasn’t struggling as much as she was. He couldn’t fault her too much. She had joked to him that an hour was being too optimistic. While he could certainly manage right now, he was irritated at the thought that he would quickly lose himself in a couple minutes when he had to start moving.

He wanted to explore her while he stayed locked against her, but her hands seemed to want to anchor him in place.

“Is it too much?” He whispered between breaths.

Pell seemed to want to look anywhere but his face. “No.”

Seinen shifted on his hands, but even that small movement elicited a small mewl from her. Seinen could hear it between the roaring in his ears and heavy breathing.

He couldn’t help but chuckle, which evoked a shudder in Pell. _Was she always this reactive to my voice?_ “Pell,” he spoke her name for the first time, the word airy like a light kiss on his lips. He saw her eyes grow wide, gasping. “Hm? Pell, is there a problem?” Her grip on his arms increased, fingers digging into firm muscle. He almost regretted deliberately asking a second time just to watch her embarrassment, because muscles spasmed around him, hitching his breath for real. He almost felt his mind grow blank. _Fuck, and we’ve only just begun!_

“N-no.” Pell was breathing harder now, eyes unfocused. “Is there…a problem with you?” She must have noticed his reaction. A reaction of hers led to one of his and back to hers in a never ending cycle. It was time he put a stop to it.

“No,” he lied. “But if that is all it takes to get a reaction, then you might want to keep your voice down. I didn’t turn on the soundproof encryption,” he lied again. He leaned in closer with a mischievous look on his face. “Wouldn’t want anyone to find out just exactly what we are doing, now would we?”

“Wait, what, but I saw—” Her voice was shocked. Her body stiffened with panic, once more distracting Seinen’s lower half.

“That was on a timer. I don’t know when it will go out. It turns off if the room gets a comm message.” _That’s a lie, but I think the way you’re struggling is adorable, and I want to see more of it._

“You—”

Seinen cut her off with a single thrust, knowing full well nothing nice was about to come out of her mouth. But now he had more control over that.

“Wait,” Pell called out, her voice steadier than before. “I just…wanted you to come…outside of me?”

Pell couldn’t see it, but he was growing impatient. “We have one of the galaxy’s top medbays. I really don’t think, out of all the things you should be worried about, it should be that—” Exasperation tugged at his words.

“Oh, just do it!” she snapped back.

 _Why does it matter, if you are so bent on dying with your crew?_ He sighed. “Fine. If it will make you feel better. But, if that’s all, I’m going to fuck you now.”

He pulled his waist back just a bit before pressing into her. He was testing the waters, a faint groan climbing up his throat when he realized that in itself was almost enough to push him over the edge. Seinen was slow and methodical, slowly gaining confidence, encouraged by the pleasure that kept building up the more he came out before sliding back in. A few groans escaped him in between breaths that soon became heavy. And Pell, who had started in whispers, had built up to moans that she couldn’t stifle. Seinen closed his eyes and rode the lilt of her voice, a smile creeping up onto his face.

When he had entered her, her body was scared, timid. But as he gently pressed on, he was insistent. Trying to tell her that, no, he wasn’t there to hurt her. Quite the opposite. Nothing that involved bloodlust or finally having enough scrap to live and see the next day and fight the next battle. He was there to make her feel like a woman first and soldier second. He coaxed her body into believing his mission statement, and the inside of her soon began to see him as welcome anytime. His movements made Pell feel hot all over. While her body definitely had warmed up to Seinen’s touch, the reminder that this was someone who once wanted her dead caused her grip on his arms to feel ice cold.

But when she peeked a glance of him in his reverie, eyes shut tight with a smile of pure ecstasy as he moved, it was impossible to think there could be any thought of murder or her injury on his mind. And, as she felt her own mind grow white, she began to feel that maybe it would be best that, if he was enjoying himself for this brief time, then maybe she could convince her brain to let the thought of impending doom go. For at least the next half hour. He was having fun? So would she.

In his next thrust, he hit a different spot. These were a different breed of sensation compared to tongue and fingers. A fuller sensation. She cried out his name, wrapping her legs around his lower back, bringing him closer to her chest. He grunted, now bent, and looked up at her.

“You’ve done this before, haven’t you?” He remarked, trying to continue the pace. He wasn’t interested in asking any longer, but making an assertion and testing it. Steadying himself with his hands closer to her shoulders, he gave her a pointed expression. “So, who was it? Your pilot? Your strategist? Someone else?” His thrusts were more forceful.

The moment Pell tried to comprehend what he was saying, he would thrust and she would forget all over. It took her a couple minutes to realize what he was saying. “ _Well_?” his voice darkened.

“W-what do you mean?” She tried to sound like he wasn’t melting her into a puddle. “What about you?”

“Heh. I’ll tell you mine if you’ll tell me yours.”

She scowled, wondering if that was enough of a response for him. It wasn’t. “Well, maybe I have, maybe I haven’t. And even if I had, how do you know it was with a human? Maybe I fucked a Zoltan.” She retorted.

She didn’t need much light to tell that his face suddenly contorted into a smile dripping with pure disgust. In revenge, he twisted his waist as he entered her, the screw-like motion making her yelp in surprise pleasure.

“ _Wrong answer_.”

“That’s unfair! You ask me that when we’re like this?! You first!”

He gave a sardonic laugh. “Oh, she’s long gone. You don’t have to worry about her. She died at the Battle of 500.”

 _Who said I was worried about her?!_ Her hand was brushed out of the way by her lover. He trailed rough fingers down, the friction making the movement more sensitive, to grip her waist.

“That was 8 years ago!” she cried.

He leaned closer, whispering into her ear. “Yes, but I’ve still got it, right?” His voice practically soaked in euphemism. Seinen’s voice tickled, making her moan. To further add to it, he kissed her ear, trailing down the side stopping at the base of her neck. Several seconds passed before Pell realized he had stopped moving, lips still on her. She attempted to lift her hips, legs tensing as she encouraged further movement, but his grip on her waist held her in place. “Your turn, Abernathy.”

She let out a frustrated sound. _Why does it matter so much?!_ Surprisingly, Seinen didn’t laugh at her struggle. Instead, he leaned back, shaking Pell’s other hand off, his own hands sliding down to grip her hips. His next thrust was the most forceful yet, sending rivets of pleasure, shooting stars shining under her eyelids. She groaned.

She was overwhelmed. Eyes wide, she tried to catch her breath. “Enough!” Pell shoved his chest away from her, sitting up as she did. Seinen leaned back on his hands, allowing her to rise. The two separated, causing Pell to shudder, and she pushed him down onto his back.

“Told you to behave, didn’t I?” she breathed out, looking square at him as she straddled him. “The time for interrogation has long been over.”

Seinen gritted his teeth and glared, his face fully illuminated. He tried to grab at Pell’s hips as she sat on him, hoping she would sit down on the one part of him that was still up. Instead, the light hit her body just right, and he got lost in a daze.

Pell easily slapped his hands away, not interested. “I don’t think so. You’re not getting rewarded for bad behavior.” She sat down and tried her best to ignore the member standing at attention mere centimeters away. That’s _what it looks like?_ Maybe she preferred the mystery in the dark instead. _At least it felt good._

“Now,” she started, “I was _going_ to tell you the answer, but it seems like you’re being a little impatient. I don’t get why this matters so much to you. You need to apologize.” She lied through her teeth as she inched closer to his face. “Or, actually, maybe that’s what you want?” She laid her soft bare chest against his hard muscles. “Maybe instead of telling you nothing, I should tell you _everything_.”

Words poured out in a flurry, all of them utter deceptions. She couldn’t help it. Seeing his face contort into something a mix of desire, rage, and helplessness spurred her onwards.

“Well, you see, we had been traveling for quite some time at that point…And we had been asked to transport some new mercenaries along the way…”

“It gets lonely on a ship when you have no one, you know?”

“But at the same time there’s almost never any privacy.”

She leaned into his ear, continuing her tale that way. She chuckled gently, locking her eyes with his side gaze of frustration. “If you want me to stop, all you have to do is say what I want to hear.” She used his prior words against him. “Tell me the magic words.”

He gave a light grunt of indignation. “I’m…” He didn’t finish.

“I’ll keep going, then. Where was I? Oh yes, the lack of privacy. But, one night-cycle, I’d had enough. I gave him this _look_ , and he understood.” Deliberately choosing to keep this imaginary man nameless, she leaned even further, kissing his earlobe.

“That’s enough, I don’t need—”

“And, when everyone else had gone to their quarters to sleep, I went into his and—”

Seinen grabbed her shoulders in a vice grip and held her away from him.

“I. _Apologize_. For. My. Lack. Of. _Decorum_.”

Pell hummed in satisfaction even as Seinen held her away from her. “I’ll accept it. Not the best delivery, but I can’t be too greedy, unlike you.” It probably wasn’t the best idea to make this man, who had just given her a very pleasurable orgasm, too angry, not when she still wanted more.

Seinen’s eyes didn’t look any less soothed by this. In fact, they appeared to be swirling with turmoil.

Pell pondered his reaction. “You never did answer me, why does this matter so much? Why do you need to know the answer so badly? I didn’t care about your history.” _Well, I didn’t until you did all_ that _to me._

“ _Why?_ ” he hissed. “Isn’t it obvious? We both know the reason. Because you’re _mine_ , Engineer.” He scanned her whole figure furiously, glamorous in the pale light, wanting to sear it into his mind forever. His eyes were no longer voracious for the data, but for her.

Pell was floored, eyes widened. She collected herself as fast as she could, pulling away from him. “I’m not!”

Too late.

In a flash, Seinen twisted his waist and pushed her back down to where she once lay. He positioned himself once more between her legs and Pell felt the shove of something familiar inside of her once more. She groaned as they adjusted together.

“Oh? You say that after everything? How can you lay here with me and still deny that we are each other’s, Pell?”

“You really are insane!” she cried.

Another thrust. “Bold words coming from someone who held a laser to my neck.”

“You’ve done…much worse to our ship!”

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing none of those attempts worked, right?”

It was his turn to speak in flurried whispers in between pants. “You call me insane, yet…your Strategist and Weapons man both care so much about you. They worship the ground you walk on, and you don’t even know that?” he punctuated his question with another thrust. Strong arms wrapped around her and as he continued the pace. Pell wrapped her arms around his shoulders, legs still tight around his waist.

“And if you think something like that doesn’t mean anything, then you’re just as insane as I am.”

“I think, ah! I think you’re just a jealous bastard!” She felt Seinen shake, his breathing rough. His member started to twitch, sending Pell grasping for tufts of his curly hair.

His next laugh quivered. “M-maybe so.” He stopped moving to try and collect himself as he spoke.

His mind was screaming at him to move faster, give her the full force of his desire. Instinct was taking over to his chagrin. _Move!_ But it was the way she held onto his hair that reminded him, grounded him. She wouldn’t be here forever. _What can I say to get her to agree?_ “S-so, if I am,” he tried to regain composure, which was hard to do when all his body wanted to do was betray him. “So, if I am, you’d stay with me, right?”

Pell, unsatisfied with the lack of movement, started to regain some clarity, although deep displeasure was rooted in her lower half. There was an itch to keep going. But judging from Seinen, he was near his limit. _When we come, what’s going to happen after?_ It was an unpleasant thought. She stroked his hair, and he sighed. “Maybe. Conditionally,” she chuckled. “You’d have to work on it.”

“I will if you’re there.”

“If I’m there, my crew has to be. And I can clearly see you hate them.”

“…You’ll be with me if your crew is alive?”

“Seinen, is the sex getting to you?” She cupped his cheeks and gave a sorrowful expression. “If my crew is alive, this ship surely won’t be in one piece for much longer.”

“But they _are_ alive. And, yet, so are _we_. I was being sincere. They can’t possibly—”

His words got caught up in Pell’s next kiss. Her tongue greeted him and he gave in to the interruption in his strategizing. Those thoughts he had of having just her to himself were seeming more like fantasy with every passing moment.

Neither of them responded after that. Both of them had become silent except for their breathing and sounds of exertion, completely fixated in the moment. Animalistic possession activated into something rough and purely carnal. The game they had been playing this entire time now corrupted into this disaster, something neither of them had intended but could no longer help. They were caught in an effervescent, short-lived moment.

Pell, with what little awareness she had left, felt Seinen’s breath on her more often as he gasped and started to tremble. His pace had picked up and Pell pulled his head close, the scent of fresh linens mixing with dirty sweat.

“C-Coming,” he moaned with a voice sweet with longing. Pell had never heard him like this before. The absurdity of a person she knew as a professor, turned enemy, turned lover briefly registered in her mind amidst the rising heat, the intermingling sweat, and pleasure she was feeling in full bloom.

Seinen groaned. She sensed his member pulse right before he exited her. A wetness on the sheets touched her left thigh.

He collapsed onto her, face buried into the crook of her neck, both gasping for air. Pell exhaled into the air while Seinen breathed onto her neck and ear, breathy and warm.

They didn’t say anything for what seemed like forever. Seinen didn’t move off of her, instead deciding to let his hand stroke her face.

“I…I got a little carried away there,” he murmured. “Are you fine?”

“Yeah.” Not really in a position to shift, Pell took stock of the metallic ceiling as it glowed with light only to dim as the satellites and stars outside their windows passed. She continued running her hand through his hair in a gentle rhythm.

She could hear Seinen attempt to say something. In low whispers that even she couldn’t make out at first despite his proximity.

“What was that?”

“I said…did you like it?” The vulnerability in his voice was clear.

Pell blinked as she gained a newfound interest in the ceiling and the faint lines and creases she could see in the not completely even sheetmetal. _Do I have to say it out loud?_ She didn’t have a baseline, but if her recent experience was anything to go by, she understood why so many people had nothing better to do but talk about sex at the academy. That, and perhaps the strict regimented days formulated such discussions in order to let off steam.

“Yeah, I did. Did you?” Hesitation punctuated every word. Upon uttering those words, Pell could have sworn she felt her shoulder grow warmer. Curiosity got the best of her, though, and she soon found her eyes flicking to his face. To her surprise, Seinen immediately shifted his own gaze away from her.

_What now?_

Seinen pushed up and hefted himself onto his side to face her, still close beside her. Or, at least Pell thought so, since she still couldn’t exactly bear to look at him. Without his touch to distract her, the fog in her brain slowly dissipated. What had she been thinking in the heat of the moment? Acting and saying things like that?

_Does he feel the same way?_

_Is it normal to feel this awkward?_

She was going to have to face the music at some point. She slowly turned to him, his face easier to make out now than during their coupling.

Her eyes met his and she got the sense he had been waiting for her to look at him. As he searched for something in her eyes, she resisted the urge to shrink away from the steady gaze. Where had all this bashfulness come from?

“Yes,” was his simple response.

Considering how verbose he could be, Pell waited for more. She already came to realize that he wouldn’t take every opportunity to torment her; perhaps she could be just a little more open to him. Just a miniscule amount would do. If he fell into her preconceived notions and broke that tiny bit of trust? Well, she could probably just kick him off the bed.

She rolled onto her side to face him. The pillow was barely big enough for the both of them, and their chests were touching, but Pell didn’t push him away.

At first, Seinen said nothing. His eyes glinted in the light and perused her face. In all the prior excitement, Pell had forgotten the blankets, now soiled, below them. She couldn’t use them to hide herself from him, even as his gaze was squarely meeting hers.

Seinen blinked. “Was there a specific answer you were expecting? I’m fairly easy to please.”

 _‘Fairly easy to please’? The hell does that mean? How many times has he had sex before for him to know that? And with how many people?_ Her mind was a whirlwind. _Wait, is it bad form to ask about this? It is, isn’t it?_

She hated to admit it, but she felt jealousy beginning to creep in. There was so much she didn’t actually know about him. Not that it had stopped her from being intimate with him in the end. How could she? She was supposed to be learning more about him first! And here she thought she was logical. She felt foolish. This was yet another experience she’d chalk up to the string of abrupt, unforeseen events she had been caught up in.

She would have thought, with her simple upbringing, nothing extraordinary would ever happen to her. She was born in Sector 1837; she’d never expected to travel far from it. Maybe to a good research facility if she worked hard enough. She’d never planned for being the target of racism, or being involved in a crucial war effort. There were too many surprises and unknowns in her life up until this point and right now, she was craving to feel grounded and secure. To have some knowledge elucidated. She needed to get closer to him.

So, with her newfound courage warm in her chest Pell spoke, “No, I just want to know what you’re actually thinking. You know so much about me. It’s not fair. Just saying you liked it isn’t enough. Can’t you give me something to work with?”

He reached out a palm to brush her cheek and pushed strands away. The hair on the back of her head resting on the pillow was a complete mess. He made a note to comb it later for her.

“Like what I’m thinking this actual moment?” he whispered.

“Sure, that would be fine. Or maybe something simple. Like, do you really only work? Nothing else?”

Seinen continued searching her eyes. “Well, I’m thinking we should probably use the bathroom.”

All that could be heard was the air flowing through the vents after that.

 _Wait, why? This is a sex thing, isn’t it. I should probably act like I know this._ “…That’s it? That’s seriously all you’re thinking?”

A smile tugged at the corners of Seinen’s mouth, and a knot twisted in Pell’s stomach. “No, that’s not all. But to answer your other question: I really don’t do much besides work all day. There’s not much time. Like you asked me earlier, it’s why I had my bedroom merged into my office.”

“But I was mostly asking that as a _joke_ , then. I didn’t _actually_ think it’d become relevant.”

He gave a low chuckle. “I didn’t either.”

“Yeah I guess you didn’t, otherwise you might have put some lotion on your hands beforehand.”

“Lotion? I don’t see what lotion has to do with anything,” he mumbled.

“Your hands, dummy! Are you so caught up with work that you can’t even take care of yourself properly?” Without thinking, Pell grabbed one of his hands and sandwiched it between hers. She rubbed her hands together. “Does that feel smooth to you?”

Instead of responding, he closed his eyes, savoring the touch. Her hands, once soft, had become gritty as a consequence of war. Though, in his opinion, even silk would be sandpaper compared to this. _Don’t go_. The soft feeling bubbled in his chest, but he stifled it by the time it rose to his throat. It wasn’t appropriate to say, and would most likely start another argument. What they had right now was ephemeral; he wasn’t going to taint it unnecessarily.

“No, you’re right, your hands don’t feel smooth,” he joked back. “But I’ll keep that in mind for next time.”

“Yeah, you better—wait, next time?”

Seinen’s smile grew absolutely devious as he drew himself close, pulling her in and nuzzling his mouth to her neck. Pell soon became distracted with his lips returning to caress her. Her breath hitched and her right hand sought to hold something, settling on gripping his shoulder.

“And, for the record,” he added, lips brushing against the sensitive skin behind her ear, “if you want to know more about me, then know that being captain is a hands-on job. It’s not like I’ve needed to touch a human to do my work properly. Overall, I do keep proper care of myself.”

“I know you do,” she drawled the last word as he began a series of kisses. “You always seem to care so much about your presentation with your uniform.”

“Oh, so you’ve paid close attention to how I look?”

“Very close.”

Seinen slowly positioned himself on top of her. He slid his leg and rubbed it against hers as he kissed her on the mouth before resuming his work on her neck. “Then I guess, if we’re being honest,” he breathed into her neck, “I’ve done the same and admired from afar.”

“Oh?”

“Yes, but unlike you I’ve come to the conclusion that you look better without your uniform.”

In a normal circumstance, which this was not, Pell would have been repulsed by such flirtation. Instead, she burst out laughing. Pell could feel him give a small chuckle himself.

As Seinen lost himself once more in his exploration of every inch of her skin, she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him close. Then in one quick motion she bucked her hips, catching him off guard and tilting him with unexpected force.

“Wha—” he tried to ask. By the time he realized what happened, he was already on his trip down to the cold ground. The sound of her laughter followed him as she heard the loud thump as he crashed below.

“Ow!” he rubbed his back in surprise.

“Haha, got you for that one!” Pell burst into peals of laughter at his reaction.

Seinen lightly groaned as he got on his knees and rested his forearms on the bed, enjoying the sudden change in mood from her. He should be angry at what she had done. It was a little uncalled for. However, so was what he said. And she was absolutely stunning when she laughed. It wasn’t a sight he had beheld before.

It took a couple minutes for the laughter to die down because as soon as she opened her eyes, she would see his lopsided smile in humble defeat and start roaring again.

“Are you done yet?”

Pell flailed an arm around as she tried to gain composure. As she got her breath back, she sighed, “Yep. I’m good now.”

Seinen brushed her cheek. “Now I have a small question to ask about you.” When Pell’s look encouraged him to go on, he asked, “Were you always like this?”

“Like what? What do you mean?”

“Back at the academy, I never saw you laugh. Maybe you did with your cre—your friends, but if so I never saw it. You only frowned during lecture and while talking to professors. Even when you tripped into me and you tried to tell me it was fine, you gave me the most nervous smile.”

Pell took one of his hands and clasped it with hers. “Well, you barely saw me to begin with. I laughed with my friends.”

“Did you? Did you really? How long did it take for you to feel comfortable doing that?”

“…A while,” she conceded.

Seinen paused as he contemplated the next thing to say. “So, even with your friends, who you so clearly care about, it took a lot of time.”

Pell snorted. “Friendships take a long time to build. I know it’s a little hard for you to believe, seeing as how your only friend is your brother.”

“I had friends too, you know,” Seinen was indignant at the remark. Though, she was mostly right. He didn’t have a friend circle like she did. “But you are right, by definition, I only have one friend now: Elliot.”

“‘Had’?” she asked.

He gazed at her. “They’re all dead,” he spoke plainly, as if whatever grief had long been washed away.

Pell blinked at the brevity of the response.

“It’s fine. It’s a consequence of war. We led separate battalions. We weren’t too close and it was only natural that we would go our separate ways into battle.”

“It really doesn’t bother you? You just…got over it?” To Pell this seemed incomprehensible. She couldn’t imagine a world where she would ever get over the death of any member of her crew, especially not Brian or Xander. Such a loss would shatter her.

“It’s fine.” He brushed her hair in a strange sort of consolation. “Like I said, we weren’t that close. It’s different from you and your pilot and your strategist. If we had to compare, then yes, I would be absolutely devastated if anything happened to Elliot. He’s my only family and…I suppose you could say he is my best friend,” he explained, choosing his words carefully. Avoiding the deaths that he still couldn’t bring himself to say out loud, the ones he’d never gotten over, the ones that still haunted him, even now, and were his impetus.

“But still,” Pell’s voice became hushed with shock. “How can you act so blasé about it?”

“Because I’ve been in this war much longer than you have.” He drew circles in her hair with his finger. “You’re, what, a little over a year in? For me it’s been a decade,” he muttered the last part.

“A _decade_? That doesn’t make any sense. What military academy let you graduate so early? I get they need soldiers and all but they wouldn’t have rush-graduated people near the first few years of the war. And the Rebels already had a lot of soldiers to begin with.”

 _Because I didn’t go to a military academy proper, and I actually grew up in Federation territory,_ he wanted to tell her. But he was, once again, getting too close to his background, too personal. The good thing about Pell tossing him off the bed was that he was reminded, once again, to keep his guard up. Who knows what other details he could have spilled in the comfort of the moment otherwise.

He glanced at her before returning his attention to her hair. “Things happened.”

“It’s…it’s just…you sound so _casual_ about it. I get that as time goes on, death doesn’t seem to sting as much, because that happened to me. But…getting over the people you fought with?”

“It’s just because I wasn’t close with them as you were, because for the most part we led separate lives. It’s like me referring to you as some coldblooded killer because you didn’t take it personally that I have killed and will kill Federation soldiers. There’s still quite a bit of disconnect in the chain that helps you not get too attached.”

He tried to smooth out her hair in consolation. “Although, yes, when you’re an ensign or a lieutenant, you’re close with your troop. But I suppose I had just spent too much of my time fretting over my moron brother to care for others.”

“But you—! It’s not like this is a game! How can you just sit there and talk about it like that?”

He raised an eyebrow at her. After all, their interactions as Rebel and Federation? Hadn’t it just been a game? A much more different game than the ones he played with the other ships, but one nonetheless.

He long since learned the rules and ways of warfare, memorized them line for line as if it were some sort of playbook. Gain enough power, destroy enough ships, and one begins to take confidence in their crimes. That one will live if they keep being ruthless. A sense of security develops when one obtains that strength. But all this destruction wouldn’t be out of pure sadism. It was for self-preservation. To obtain security and money. With a stronger ship, it becomes incredibly easy to soar into a battle feeling that everything will be ok.

But sometimes even that was not enough to protect his soul from the desensitization. Seinen felt the ennui long ago. The gallows humor got to him. He very quickly became able to blend morbidity with the mundane, as he was doing right now.

“Yes, like you’ve stated. I’m casual about talking about the death of my fellow generals and captains. I’ve also stopped caring about the deaths that I’ve caused in order to make my vision of a better galaxy a reality, just like you.” Seinen stopped playing with her hair. “What, you can’t love me despite all the people I’ve killed?” he asked sardonically, though the moment the word ‘love’ escaped his lips he could swear he felt his cheeks burn.

Either Pell was too deep in thought or she purposefully ignored the question’s wording. “And how many people is that?”

A pause, and then, “Three thousand, one hundred, and ninety-seven.”

“…Really?” Fear crept into her tone.

“No,” he snorted, “I don’t keep track of the ships I’ve destroyed, even if I wanted to. I’m not some sociopathic lunatic.”

“Oh,” Pell released the tension building in her muscles. “Wait, you were kidding?” She revved back up and punched him straight in the chest as he chuckled. “You jackass! Joking about something like that! But yeah, I guess if you were, we would have been at each other’s throats even more.”

“You say that like that’s a bad thing,” Seinen pouted, almost sounding displeased at the statement.

Pell didn’t say anything for some time. She stared up at the ceiling, watching how the shadows shifted in the reflected light. “…I used to keep track, you know.”

“…Oh? So the lunatic was _you_ this whole time!” Seinen chortled.

Pell curled herself inwards. “We had sensors. We could see their ship. Every single ship. Unless there were environmental hazards, we saw what we were doing. We saw the life signatures of everyone on board. Survival was the only way, and sometimes you just needed scrap more than whatever they surrendered, which made me feel even worse. But still…it was pretty horrible. I thought I’d feel better if I kept a running tally. But I had to stop.”

 _“Survival was the only way.”_ Pell’s words rang through Seinen’s head. He wanted to open the floodgates. She sounded like she would understand. He wanted to tell her every small thing, every dirty little rotten detail.

He opened his mouth.

And then closed it.

_What could I say? She would definitely think I’m a monster._

“You value your crew a lot, wouldn’t you say?”

There was nothing short of raw, sincere feeling in Pell’s eyes. “More than anything.”

“Even your own family?”

She scowled and shrugged the best she could considering she was laying on her side. “I only have my parents, and trust me, we will never be close.”

“Then I guess that is where I get confused, because to me that seems unfathomable that you would be so blasé about _your_ background.” He certainly couldn’t imagine viewing friends over family, but he was sure there were things Pell wasn’t telling him, just as he wasn’t telling her.

“My friends have been more family than they ever have, I guess.”

The feeling that had been building up in him till now poured over as she spoke those words. He wanted to protect her. And if he was being honest, had been for so long now. Would it even be possible for them to grow as close as she and her crew were? To become…family?

“Do you want to go home, Pell? Do you want to see your crew again?”

She smiled at him. “More than anything. I’d go anywhere Brian and Xander are.”

“Does it matter whether the Federation wins or loses to you, then?”

“Of course they have to win as well!” She was back to being indignant.

His chest heaved as he sighed. “If I had to choose between Elliot and the Rebellion, I’d choose my little brother. Aren’t you talking about a similar feeling?”

She paused, and then, “Yes. I guess I am. I value them. I want them to be happy and safe.”

He exchanged warm smiles with her. “Then we can agree on something, for once.” He climbed over her and laid by her side, stroking her arm as Pell turned to face him.

They rested in silence, faint smiles still on their face. Pell closed her eyes and opened her mouth.

“What are we?”

Seinen’s hand jerked to a stop at the aftershock of the question.

Her eyes popped open. Alarm flashed through her chest.

She saw Seinen’s startled expression and she sprung up. “Oh, right, you said we should use the bathroom, right? I’ll go first!”

“Wait—” Seinen tried to grab her hand as she shook him off.

Pell sped as fast as she could without outright running. As soon as she reached the door, it slid open automatically, and she took shelter, not looking back at the mess she just created.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> E/N: FINALLY
> 
> ARE YOU SATISFIED NOW?? 
> 
> I'm curious as to whether you felt like the tension was still increasing during the smut/if it took a dip/if it started increasing back up again.
> 
> Rebels always come after you slowly but surely, eh? ~~Or maybe they just come haha~~
> 
> I really liked that flashback scene actually, I got inspiration from it reading the beginning of an Arabian Nights AU doujin for a game I've played. (If you're interested I can link it; it's SFW). Inspiration truly can come from anywhere.
> 
> I wanted to ask you all if my story has a vibe/aesthetic/image and if so, what it is for you? For me, there's a very clear vibe that I've been trying to convey: I think of Seinen's room, but no one is in it. The lights aren't on, and there are blue and white lights, with the occasional red light flowing through the room from the windows. It's a very fluid image. It's rich and...comforting, in a way.
> 
> I was gonna make some horrible FTL related smut puns here, but this E/N is getting long enough. I'll save it for 7 ;)
> 
> I will be taking a vacation and won't be posting a chapter next week. There is a chance I might not post a chapter the week after that, but if so, I will mark it in the summary. For now, just assume I'll be back with a chapter on the 11th. **EDIT: DUE TO NEEDING A BREAK TO ADD SOME EDITS TO THE LATER CHAPTERS, WILL BE TAKING TIME TO POLISH IT UP EVEN FURTHER. YOU WON'T REGRET IT, PROMISE :)**
> 
> I am looking for a beta to help with chapters 8 and onwards. If you are interested, please let me know. You can also contact me through reddit (u/laniusplushie); same username on dreamwidth.
> 
> Have a nice day!  
> 


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